in Canna-Mommas
Postpartum rage?
Hello mamas, I haven’t been feeling so great lately. I don’t feel depressed. But I’m not sure what it is. I feel okay one moment then suddenly I’m overwhelmed and I get frustrated and my body gets so tense then I’m angry then I cry. Today is the fastest it’s ever happened, within minutes I went from 0 to 100. It doesn’t help that my aunts also have their grandchildren to help with so when I reach out they are busy. My cousins and I had kids around the same time unplanned. It’s like suddenly I don’t have anyone to reach out to. I had to change health plans so my therapist isn’t covered. I don’t have the greatest relationship with my own mother. My siblings are dysfunctional so I can’t talk with them. I don’t know what to do anymore. I go out but it doesn’t help. And I don’t even know what I’m doing for Mother’s Day. I don’t want to be with my MIL because she makes everything all about her only. I just don’t know what to do anymore. I hate that my baby isn’t getting the best version of me. Has anyone gone through this? What helped? How did you get rid of the sudden mood changes? Did smoking help?
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I still feel the same way but smoking definitely helps. I do end up bottling everything until dad comes home and he takes a lot of the stress hits but once I smoke I'm apologizing and talking through everything that had me stressed or frustrated. If I have help throughout the day from friends or family I'll try and get a little smoking in just incase something happens. I'm a lot more chill and fun and loving when I got a little high going. Also don't stress too much that babies aren't getting your best self. I have a 1year and 2year old and you can see they know and appreciate the best you can do. And I'll second what Brandi said, especially with this app... you are NEVER alone!
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I went through this for nearly 8 years. Besides sticking to the meds my Dr forces me (I fought hard to get the non-hard stuff)..... I finally ended up smoking again and that has helped so drastically. While you're unable to go and talk to a professional, do whatever you can to let things out... write it, sing it, paint it, cook it, diarrhea of the mouth to a long-distance friend... Anything! But don't bottle that stuff up, and NEVER think you're alone.