Hi! I was a first time mom and my PPA smacked me in the first at 2 months. During that time I had nightmares every night/sleep paralysis which made me petrified. I was literally scared to go to bed, scared to be alone, and life was just so dark.. i was so sleep deprived I was literally hallucinating— it was just bad. I didn’t understand how I just gave birth to such a beautiful baby and was feeling like my life was over. It was to the point that I wanted to check myself into the hospital. But, with time and prayer things got BETTER. I saw a psychiatrist and started taking magnesium glycinate that you can literally get at Walgreens/CVS which really eased my anxiety. (It’s worth noting prior to my baby, I’ve never struggled with anxiety)… but, here I am & she just turned 1 a few days ago. I feel like myself again, I can sleep without being scared, I’m not anxious.. just hang in there. It gets better & I thank the lord for that!🩷🫶🏽
I used medication and no longer had thoughts of harming my baby or myself. That was a decade ago, my son is now 11 and we have faced so many challenges since then. He had severe eczema, diagnosed and medicated for ADHD. Dupixent injections mostly cleared up his eczema. He has dealt with bullying all through elementary school. Now starting middle school and hoping for the best 🙏
I made a new friend who just focused on talking to me about anything and everything and who made sure i focused on myself as well. She taught me that Theres no hard and fast rules about parenting. If baby is sleeping in their carseat and you dont want to move him/her let babe be and let them sleep there, if you find it easy to use a pacifier use it how you want. People may say theres certain things you need to do but if it doesnt work for you dont do it, if what you are doing works it works. I have 3 sleep areas for my son, 2 playpens one in living room for when im downstairs, one in my bedroom and a travel crib on my bed, the travel crib is the easiest for me even with everyone complaining about me using it because they think their way is best for me without asking what works for me. But i ignore them and just do what works for me. My new friend tells me to just drop by whenever and that helps alot, because i get out and am able to focus on more than my household stress and get to enjoy myself because
She takes my son and holds him when he needs to be held or whatever or put back to sleep when she sees me struggle in the tiniest way.
Another positive is my son started smiling and it melts my heart each time. Having atleast one person in your corner changes alot. Because i was struggling lots with my son even though he is the easiest baby i have ever met
I am sorry you are going thru this. They say PPD can start at any time between 1st few years of child birth. I don’t have a story but I really really want you to go to your doctor and get the help that you need. Be it therapy or medication or both. Also please talk as much as possible to your trusted other half or a friend you feel comfy with. Conversation can make a huge diff and you feel light and listened and being cared for. Giving birth is no joke and takes a lot from your body and mind. Don’t hesitate to ask for help.
I self managed anxiety for like 10 years but PPA got me on medication. It does help. I also got therapy for anxiety which was immensely helpful
I got on medication after both of my pregnancies for PPA and it made all the difference in the world. I'm unmedicated for another mental health condition, so I have great coping mechanisms, but my usual go to strategies weren't enough. I could barely eat, I couldn't sleep more than 20 mins at a time, I felt like I couldn't breathe. My spouse and a trusted doctor convinced me to give medication a try after a few weeks of me being stubborn and waiting to see if I was experiencing the more typical "baby blues" which were supposed to resolve... Eventually. It wasn't just baby blues for me, and I'm glad I got help. In about a week, my mood started to stabilize and I was less anxious, more present as a parent and more functional. It made such a difference that as soon as I started feeling the same PPA symptoms after my second delivery, I got back on medication before I even left the hospital. 50mg of generic Zoloft was all it took, and I haven't experienced any side effects. There's help out there, reach out