Running off

I have a 12-week-old baby and a nearly 3-year-old. I have always let my toddler walk and he's happy to do so. Today we were at our local field with some friends. Recently he's taken to running off. Not a little way in front where I can see him. But a good mile ahead or in the opposite direction. Today it was a different field through a gate and up a dirt track. If I was on my own, I'm not sure how I would have gotten him back. I had to leave my baby and run after him. He was just laughing at me. Once he was back, we made a strap and tied him to the pram, kicking and screaming all the way home. He has reins, but in a place like that, I wouldn't think I'd need them. When we are on roads, he has them on with no problem if the baby is in the pram. I don't want to feel like I can't take him places because of this, but it's getting that way. Was he just showing off for his friends? Or is this because my attention is divided? Who knows. I just needed to rant. He's so confident, maybe a little too confident for his own good. 😭😭😭😭

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Same with my 4 year old and definitely started more bc of the divided attention

I feel like I'm having to choose between them. Scared to go out by myself.

My toddler is two and doing this. No sibling either. He will literally run so far. Not a care of roads, strangers, losing me. I really don’t know what to do about it. I hope you find something that will work especially with a newborn. X

Reigns are gonna have to be on, i think. trying to get an almost three year old to understand that bad things happen sometimes and staying with mummy is better is hard.

It is hard, but I would still communicate it to him. My son is 2 and a half, and most of the time he’s great with walking, using the roads and not running off too far, but he has his days/moments… I’m very consistent in my message - wait for the green man, hold mummy’s hand or the buggy etc and explain why and show him the cars on the road. When he doesn’t listen - I take his freedom away and he has to sit on the buggy chair, I literally won’t move until he gets on. Once he starts listening again - he can walk/ hold onto the buggy. I find consistency is the key. They’re kids, they’ll always have their moments, particularly when you have more than one, but they have better understanding than we sometimes even realise. *if you have a baby carrier, I’d suggest using that sometimes. I found using it a little easier when managing 2

In the case of consistency. I have always had the same boundaries for out and about, and a lot of the time, he does abide by them. his understanding is in no way limited he's advanced for his age. Big feelings are so tough for them to navigate, and we have a good balance with helping him express them, but like any toddler, sometimes they take over. The carrier does work, but running after him with a baby strapped to me is also not ideal. It's just unfortunate that at the times when we are places like the field, etc, baby is in the pram, so I can play too. We did have a buggy board, but after 20 mins, use the wheel fell off, and he's been petrified of them ever since as he got really hurt. They share the pram, so if walking the dog, my oldest is in the pram and baby in the carrier. He knows with the dog in tow I need him in the pram and doesn't fight on that.

He's just testing your boundaries. As so as he understands that running off means the reins go on, he'll think better of it.

My son was 2 in May. He's just starting to understand that if I stay stop he has to stop straight away if he's walking "by himself" I've been very strict on saying if he doesn't then he is either carried or back in the pushchair (if we have it with us) Today he asked to walk and told me he would listen and stop before I'd even mentioned it and he did really well. Obviously he is only little so I don't expect him to do it perfectly but he did listen well today and did stop every time even though I did say it twice at one point and was expecting him to have to go back in the trike.