My thoughts
I just wanted to share my thoughts on something my partner and I have struggled with, that I don't see other people talk about. When I explain to others they don't seem to understand!
As well as the grief and loss of a baby after miscarriage, we have really struggled with an identity crisis. Both my partner and I feel like we have had to mourn our identities as "mum and dad". During pregnancy we got into the mindset of "mum and dad" and after miscarriage we feel like "who are we now?!"
I wonder if anyone else has felt this way and any tips on how to find yourself again
Show your support
As soon as you get pregnant you are parents, unfortunately not everyone gets to bring home a baby to raise. Pregnancy is very fragile, each one is as unique as we are. I was completely consumed with trying to become a parent during infertility (I had gynae issues not my husband) that all my self worth was tied to that & I felt such hate for my body. When I started to accept it might not happen & look at all the other titles & skills I have like being a good wife and how hard I work then I got pregnant. I've got PTSD from that time, I'm triggered by so much.
I know a page where a woman talked about this. She just lost her son at 26 weeks and they had been doing daily updates on being a mom and dad. I personally believe you are a mom and dad, there was someone alive that shared both of your stardust. Even though they are gone, they existed, period.