How much are your 4 year olds doing ??
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My daughter has been dressing and undressing herself for about a year, but everything else I assist with. She is capable of wiping herself and has been doing so at preschool for a year, but at home, it's always, "MOOOOOM! WIPE MEEE!!!" 🥴
My daughter turned 4 in June and she still needs assistance with some things. She can bathe and wipe on her own but I’m still there if she needs it. She doesn’t like brushing her teeth so I have to do it and she can undress and put bottoms on. Still a little rough with the shirts. She went to pre-k this year and I can already tell she’s more independent
My 4 year old likes to do things herself but sometimes needs help. She brushes her teeth but then I go over them and help her floss, she can mostly dress by herself but sometimes needs a little help, she wipes herself when it's just pee but needs a hand when it's poop, she likes to wash herself in the bath but I make sure she's done a good job and I still wash her hair. I'm not sure what you mean by putting themselves to bed, but we have a routine with books and songs and then tuck them in and say goodnight (my 4 and 2 year old share a room) but we don't rock them to sleep or anything anymore.
Kids need supervision brushing their teeth until they are like 8. I brush my son’s teeth at night & also let him take part. We talk through it. Our ped still asks that we supervise bath time. My son does his best to wash up, but I’ll help too. I still help with wiping. Not trying to deal with a rash. We are also still working on dressing. He’s got undressing down.