Ttc

Hi we just started trying very recently, we are very new to this so don’t know alot . But I’ve been doing research and it says to have sex everyday or every other day in order to get pregnant. We have been doing it twice a week or three max a week for a month.

You can say this totals to around 8 times a month varied out throughout. Would this be enough to get pregnant? Or would it need to be every days so around 4 times a week etc till close to your period ?

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do you track when you’re ovulating? that’s the time to prioritize trying! otherwise just do it as much as you can

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As long as you’re having sex during your fertile window then your chances are higher - you definitely don’t need to be having sex every single day throughout your whole cycle, I’ve been there and it’s hard work and never paid off! We tried for years and ended up conceiving after only having sex once in my cycle! X

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I also advise getting the prescribed folic acid, 5mg version. As plus size ladies we need a bit more than the over the counter type.

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Get to know your cycle and then you’ll know the key times to be having sex to conceive. Some women (I say some because only after having a baby do I now have this!) have cervical mucus that is like an egg white consistency that indicates you are in your fertile window. This is usually around a week after your period finishes. For me it’s 5 days after my period finishes and last 2-4 days. Ovulation tests confirm that’s when I ovulate also.

Ovulation tests are very helpful. I have a 16 month old. I wasn’t really tracking that month because I felt like my life was being consumed by trying to make a baby but felt ovulation cramps, tested and sure enough peak day and we made a baby. It took a few months though! Don’t expect this to be a had sex on the right day I’m pregnant situation. 12 months is normal for TTC before conception.

Also book in with a dr and get a pre pregnancy health check done. You’ll be surprised what they can see from just a blood test!

Good luck! Baby dust!

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Just to add to what Alexandra said - ovulation tests don’t tend to work on women work PCOS so just to be mindful about that if you do have PCOS x

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Family culture difference on money

Sorry this is long, I hope some of you get to the end and give advice!!!

So I’m a very thrifty person, things are tight at the moment, the cost of living crisis and my house is heated by oil so things are extortionate. We aren’t on the bread line but we aren’t flush, hubby might be made redundant so there is some financial pressure.

Sometimes I buy my sons something nicer, on the justification that I can sell it on after (♥️ vinted ♥️). I have also been planning on pretty much breaking even most of the baby things I bought from face book market place, side by crib, baby changing unit, etc.

Hubby and I have different money cultures with our families (he’s Indian, I’m British). I’m my family we don’t mix money, we would help each other out if someone was in trouble and will get each other gifts on special occasions. With hubby’s family money is much more fluid, they will give each other things worth thousands of £ just because.

Hubby’s brother bought him a new laptop and a new Google phone, he’s been very generous to hubby. Hubby hasn’t given the same back because brother is much richer.

Hubby and I mostly share finances. If it’s relevant I’m the higher earner.

Now to the point! My babies are so cute they’ve given hubby’s brother (currently single) baby rabies. He’s asked for our baby stuff when we’re done with it. He’s been so generous to hubby I feel really stingy saying no. But I’d never have bought some of the stuff if I wasn’t going to get a return on it - the thought makes me a bit anxious. If we gave all our baby stuff given the second hand value it still wouldn’t equal what the brother had given hubby.


I thought maybe I could give him some stuff but sell some stuff, but hubby said then his brother will just have to go out and buy that stuff, so I should name my price and ask his brother for the money. That makes me feel very uncomfortable, given how generous the brother has been to hubby.

So what do I do ladies? Give it all and suck it up? Give part of it and sell parts on Vinted/FB, or ask hubbys brother for money for it and be uncomfortable? Or do you see another solution?

No one is being entitled or rude here, just a culture difference I need to navigate.

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