Emergency c section

I have a fear of stiches and operations. During my whole pregnancy I believed in my heart that I won’t have a C-section. I prayed and prayed. Baby was in head down position, I went overdue had contractions and went into labor for days. I was completely against c section, I was scared of it and didn’t do any research around it as I was too scared. I thought baby is head down during labour, I’m ready to push and give it my all. 4 days overdue, baby did a poo in my tummy, they broke my water. Baby’s heart beat changed and they broke the news to me at 7am that they’ll be taking me into operation theatre. I can’t explain the fear and anxiety inside of me. I thought this is over for me, my body gave up on me and I won’t be able to live with this. My phobia of stiches will make me want to rip them out of my body if I see them. I had the most traumatic experience from shaking for hours. I can’t explain my emotions at the time. It took me two weeks to look at my stiches, my partner cleaned and dried them for two weeks. It took 3 weeks for the postpartum shaking to stop. Ladies, if I have one advice please research into c section even if you are not a big fan of it. Research how to recover, others experience, what’s you’ll need etc. don’t let it scare you!