We chose lifelong friends for our Children’s godparents. They are individuals who can step in if we pass away or even act on our behalf in the event we are not present. For example, when we had to go to the hospital because one of our son’s was in the ICU and we needed someone to take care of our other son (drop off/pick up, answer any emergencies at the school). It’s not a volunteering type of role. Today, this role has shifted from godparents being a second set of loved ones being responsible for your child to them even showing up for your child financially. One of my friends deemed her godchild a beneficiary if something happens to her. She also bought a home and has her godson listed in her will for it to be gifted to him if she passes. She attends all major events, birthdays, first days of school, etc. I think it’s an intimate decision that should involve lots of thought. Do your values align with this person? Will they take excellent care of my child if something happens?
It’s usually them that will care for a child in the event the grandparents are not able to do so.
My best friend is my son's God mother. She is also good friends with my husband. We chose her over a family member because in the event of mine and my husband's untimely death we want her to care for him. She would honor how we want him to be raised and also provide him with a stable home. Her values align with ours and she would be a good role model and support for him, financially and emotionally. Being a god parent is an honor because it is something that is earned. Not something handed out to any loser who volunteers
I'd say something lighthearted and non- committal like "thanks for throwing your hat in the ring, glad to know you plan to love our son as much as we do" and hope they don't bring it up again
@Kimarys I agree with you I feel like he just wants the title not what comes with it.
@Sarah I kinda did I said I wanted to talk with my sons father to ensure what his family practices as we come from two different backgrounds and Im going to leave it at that tbh
We don't have godparents, because our daughter isn't baptised. And we aren't planning to. We are agnostic when being polite and in reality more of atheists 🙃 If you are religious there is nothing wrong with having your child baptised and choosing a godparent. But I would go for someone I trust and see as a role model for my child. I would jokingly tell him it's been noted and move on. In all honesty he probably won't bring it up again, sounds like he doesn't care much. If he mentions it again you can explain your stance.
There is a huge difference between the title “godparent” and “guardian”. Godparent is responsible for helping with religious upbringing, whereas a guardian is someone who would look after your children and raise them as if they were their own in the event you and the father pass away.
@Shelby it depends on the culture. In my country a god parent is both
@Kimarys as someone with no religious upbringing, I do not have godparents, nor do my kids. They do however have named guardians in the event me and their father pass away. The title was placed on both my sister, and his to decide who would raise them if/when we pass.
My sister is technically my kids' "godmother" but what really matters is a will filed with a lawyer.
My definition is someone that would look after and step into parenting guidance rule weather something happens to us or not Godparent is an honor, it's a privilege it ain't him lol They both got some nerve and audacity they are both wearing blinders lol I'd ask him his definition and if he says similar I'd be honest and say that's not a role I see for you in my son's life
@Shelby that’s what I read in google and I’m not religious but my partners family is
@Priscilla my sister has a hard time saying no honestly. I feel like deep down she feels exactly like I do but her man is a little bitch when he hears no and he makes her life hard but I do wish she told him something to give him an idea even like “hey it’s a title that I’m not sure my sister even practices in her daily life I’m also unsure if she’s already set that for someone else” or SOMETHING LOL
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@Nilo I’m planning to write a will asap this was something I had in mind and I would definitely include that
Or at least give you a heads up like sheesh
My philosophy is if they’re not married AND healthy role models for your kids, then don’t make them your kid’s godparents. Your sister’s fiancé sounds like a useless idiot. Trust your instincts ❤️