Curious. How many of you have access to your partner’s phone?

I have his password but have only been on his phone if he’s asked me to do something. I find it an invasion of privacy and I’d just leave before snooping to hurt my own feelings

@Daija I like that and think that’s very healthy but I’m not following you on leaving the relationship before snooping? I get snooping is wrong but what if you leave the relationship and it turns out there was nothing worth leaving ? Surely you’d want to check first

I don’t need access

I have his password and the only stuff on his phone he should be ashamed of is shitty memes

@SquishyMommy1 good for you :)

Neither of us have passwords and don't care if we use each others phones. There's no need to snoop though because we fully trust each other

I have all of my partner’s passwords phone and otherwise, but have never been through his phone nor would I want to. Vice versa. Plus what’s done in the dark always comes to light!

I used to be the girl who didn’t go through phones and “fully trust” the person I’m with until I realized how delusional it made me look because boy had cheated on me and hid it from me for years 😂😂😂😂 yall can continue not snooping for sake of privacy and trust but I refuse to be in a relationship with somebody if they’re going to have me out here looking stupid

@Daija I get this! Like if something made me feel like that there’s a bigger trust issue. I’m the same! If I feel like I need to check, I’m out. Period.

We know each other’s passwords but we don’t snoop, it’s still our own personal space. It’s mostly for emergencies, ie if he landed in the hospital tomorrow and I needed to contact his workplace etc, I’d need access to his phone.

Nope because If I feel the need to snoop I already suspect something so the trust is messed up. Either I’m going to address it head on or I’m going to leave. When checking someone’s phone I feel like you make the shoe fit. Ex. This girl I know has been cheated on in the past (she cheated back) she forgave him he doesn’t know she cheated. She swears he secretly knows and is cheating again, checked his phone found nothing but now it’s he just got sneakier. Like girl just leave lol

Yep we share passwords, his phone is basically mine also and mine his, we actually usually only have one on us when we are out together (either his or mine) I have had a lot of trust broken in the past (by former boyfriends) and my husband has helped me trust again, it wasn’t necessary his job to fix it, he never gave me a reason not to trust him but by him allowing me to look at his phone whenever through whatever has helped me a lot. I don’t go through it anymore because I am healed now and in a healthy, trusting relationship but I know if I felt the urge to I could.

I know his password and sometimes I’ll be like ‘can I borrow your phone’ because I want to send myself pictures he took or to use his calculator if my phone isn’t on me for example but I’d never go on it to check it - I feel like if I felt I needed to check his phone then I probably wouldn’t be with him (unless it was me who had bad trust issues and he was likely genuinely innocent then I’d have to work on myself)

We both have passwords but know each others but rarely use the others except occasionally for something quick. I've never snooped in my husband's phone and as far as I know he's never snooped in mine.

I meant to click “I do”.

If you are in a relationship with this man and have a child by him what the fuck really is privacy? He be balls and or even likely face deep in your privacy but a phone is off limits?? You share a home a spoon a cup usually it’s said what’s mine is yours and your is mine. He has your body and by the looks of you calling him your husband more than likely he told you those words more or less. How could a phone be the most intimate part of him? But you’re supposed to have soul ties or spiritually bound and be one …idk it might just be me. It isn’t about needing or wanting access it’s about principle of the fact

I don’t need or want access.

We’re not married but this is something for me that I will have when we are or I’m not getting married. However presently, if I ever asked he would show me but I don’t have his code, he has mine. I never understood the whole privacy thing when it came to phones tbh but I’m also just a very open person and don’t have anything to hide or that would require “privacy”

When my husband started a new career a couple years ago he had to change his phone password for compliance reasons because he has confidential information on his phone. Before that I always knew the password and he knows my password as it hasn’t changed. Neither of us have any need to go through the other’s phone.

@GMF also this! I personally have corporate litigation stuff all in my phone because I work in corporate defense and I’m privy to information my employer and clients expect me to protect. I have an NDA and would lose my job! No one needs to be in my phone, so I show the same respect. Also when I got divorced, my ex husband was admonished by the judge for exactly this type of behavior. Even in marriage there is a LEGAL reasonable expectation of privacy. It is considered coercive control and is actually illegal here in CA. Just a fun fact!

I have my partners password but even without it I feel like he crosses my boundaries! He has previously called one of his girl friends babe before I found out right out the birth of our son and felt like shit!

You keep catching him over stepping boundaries/ cheating ??? Girl after that he would have no privacy because he lost trust that’s crazy he basically showing he don’t care at all because he’s still hiding stuff that’s sooooo crazy

Because if she feels the need to violate the trust and is that worried then there is no reason to stay with someone you don’t trust

My bd had my passwords but couldn't do the same and one day I figured out his password and well safe to say I found out lots of bad stuff and that is why I'm not with him.

@Victoria Girl preach 😂😂

Please explain to me what tf is privacy when it comes to phones and you’re in a relationship with someone!?🥴😂😂😂 yall sound real foolish💯 talking about privacy😂😂😂 privacy left the room when yall started having sex together! When yall had kids together! When yall moved in with each other!!! And for some when yall married each other!!!! There’s no more privacy!!! That phone is the least private place… you can trust that man with all your heart that don’t mean he’s not going to cheat on you! Everything you need to know about that man is in his phone! Don’t be naive

I have access to everything of my fiancé's whether it's his phone, bank account, amazon account, you name it. But I don't bother going through his phone. I'm too exhausted from being pregnant and taking care of our toddler. I trust him 1000%. Now my phone on the other hand, I have to delete my messages with my best friend 😂😂 that's the only thing he has to worry about. But I'm sure he knows i need to vent about him sometimes.

I know his passcode but don’t look unless he asks me, like if he’s driving. Or if my phones dead. But confused why this even matters when you know he’s cheating and keep catching him anyway? It sounds like the phone thing is neither here or there 🤷🏽‍♀️

i have access to my husband’s phone and all his social media passwords but i never go on. we’ll go on each other’s phones if the other person doesn’t have theirs and we need to google or something lol. but if i feel like i need to snoop..i’d just leave. if a man makes me question his loyalty to me i don’t need him. if you need confirmation on something just ask him about it

We know each others passwords but I’ve never been on his phone without his knowledge ie mines on charge and I want to Google something or take a picture.

My husband didn’t have a password on his phone for a while I kept telling him he needs to put a password on his phone in the event that it’s lost or stolen. When he finally did, he told me the password which is easy to remember. He’s given my nephew his phone password to play games, my mom his phone password so she can open the gps and he’s given my friend his phone password to play music from his phone when we’re hosting them. He hasn’t changed his password since he put it on 5 years ago. He doesn’t have my phone password though. He’s never asked for it, if he needs something from my phone he just asks me to open it. I have never snooped through his phone before and have no desire to.

We don’t have each others passwords because we value each others privacy, but neither have a problem with lending each other our phones. Sounds like passwords are the least of your problems in this relationship…

I have full access to my husband’s phone just like he does to mine. We don’t go through each other’s phone regularly or anything like that though because there’s no need. (I’ve done it once before, it was boring lol)

I have full access to his phone and he has full access for mine we use each others phones but never snoop through we trust each other.

I don't have my fiancé's passcode. However, if I asked for it, he would give it to me in a heartbeat. But why would I? If your relationship has trust then there's no need to go snooping! If you feel the need to snoop then you have no trust, therefore your relationship is dead anyway.

@Abbie exactly this! Do we all of a sudden lose our right to privacy when we enter a relationship?!

I have access to it, but have never had the need to go through it

Never crossed my mind.

@Sorrel I didn’t say it matters I asked because I was curious

I know his passcode, he knows mine. Occasionally we’ll use the others phone if we’ve run out of battery or something. I don’t feel the need to snoop, I trust my partner.

I know his password but i wouldn’t just go on it unless i felt the need to x

I do but I don't need or want it

@Amber 😂 I know but I’ve emotionally checked out of the relationship and working on my exit plan. I’ve been a stay at home mum/housewife for years and would like to establish myself before leaving him

Ok fair enough, it was just in response to the added context you gave of him cheating.

If I asked my partner to have his phone he would give it to me without a second thought. However, because of the trust I have in him, I wouldn't abuse that and start checking up on him.

Well if you checked out I’d say worrying about his phone is the least of your worries Goodluck and always choose your piece of mind you deserve to be with someone you wholeheartedly trust & believe me I been there in your shoes it does get better when you leave

We have access to everything of each others, I mean I never look at it I have no need to but my Face ID is registered in case I need it and his is on mine x

We each have a finger print things to be able to unlock each others phone but I trust him enough to not go snooping anyway x