Please tell me second vaginal births are better than first! 😭
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This is absolutely my fear too. I've just found out I'm pregnant with number 2, and had a traumatic vaginal birth with number 1 in lockdown. I always said I'd opt for an elective c section if we had a second.
I had a precipitent labour with my first and got ptsd. I looked at an elective c section for my second last year but ultimately had him vaginally and unmedicated once again. It was VASTLY better. Took far less time, and the labour agony was hit only about 25mins before he was born (compared to 4h with my daughter 3 years ago). Baby was far less traumatised, I had no tears nor surgery, and I can actually look back on his birth with a feeling of nostalgia. Second births are almost always faster and easier. But if you want to have a c-sec, and are fully informed of the consequences etc, and it will make you less stressed, then go for it. Am assuming you're UK here of course.
Idk if my input would have weight but I have had 2 C-sections and the recovery is hard (at least for me). I never had the opportunity to have a vaginal birth. Failed to go into labor with my first and had a failed VBAC attempt. It's a major surgery. From what i have heard most say vaginal has an easier recovery. However, you need to do what is best for you. If having a csection is better for you mentally than go for it. Just know that csections can have their own challenges. But end of the day, make the decision that is best for you 🤗💜
@Raya what was it that swayed you to have another vaginal after looking at an elective? I’m so glad the second birth was a much more positive experience.
@Shelley most of my friends had c sections so very aware of the recovery but their birthing experiences are much more positive and calmer than mine was which is a huge push for the elective. Overall yes vaginal births have a quicker recovery but it took me 8 months to fully heal down there after rounds of antibiotics and reconstructive surgery because everything was so badly damaged so I feel like I would find a c section recovery okay after having dealt with the awful recovery the first time round!
What do you think it was that made your first birth traumatic?
My second labour and delivery was a lot quicker than the first and a positive experience. With the first I had an induction and epidural. Second time round I just had the gas and air and I healed a lot quicker and was on my feet earlier. A few of my friends that have had their second recently all had positive second births compared to their first. All had vaginal births. My friend is a midwife and within their coworkers they all agree that second labours are their personal favourites 🤭
You are very entitled to which ever birth you choose. It sounds as though your birth was incredibly traumatic. If you want a c-section, have one. 💪🏼
I don't know if this helps but all 3 of my births have been vaginal, With my 3rd labour , I just about made it to the hospital , I had no time for any pain relief she came out within 5mins of my waters gushing - I gave birth standing up ..... However, it was probably the best birth I had I kinda felt like a warrior an healing was very quick. With my 1st and 2nd I was induced and I had gas n air with my first and my 2nd i had an epidural but the recovery took time as I had slight nerve damage - which is a common side affect of the epidural. However with my 2nd he was prem at 24wks and breech they did mention c-section but I rejected as I didn't want the long stay at hospital after, he was so tiny anyway and he came out footlong . X
First was 27 hours and had to have an episiotomy. Second was 3 hours with no “damage”
I’m due with my second in 5 weeks and had this same struggle. Ask your midwives if they have a mental health resource person on the team - my team does, she specializes in birth stories and processing traumatic births. She was able to walk me through everything and explained exactly why certain things happened and answer every specific question I had about what to expect/how to prepare for the second one. I won’t lie I still have a ton of anxiety about it but I am attempting the vaginal birth again.