What not to say

Just taken my dog for a walk and bumped into an elderly couple, (friends of my mother-in-law) who said “sorry to hear about your tragedy, but you know life goes on”. Life goes on??? I had to give birth to my daughter sleeping only a few months ago at 40+6 and you think it’s appropriate to tell me never mind, life goes on? I’m so upset. My life has turned upside down and though I appreciate we have to find a way to live without our babies, life doesn’t just “go on” for us. My partner just lets these things go over his head but it really gets to me when people say such insensitive things.
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Totally agree, it's a very insensitive thing to say to a parent who has lost their child! I'm so very sorry for the loss of your beautiful baby girl, utterly heartbreaking 💔. I'm just looking at my girl who was born in May at 40+6 aswell, I can't imagine your pain. They obviously didn't say it to upset you, but still it stings. I only ever say how sorry I am when someone loses a child, never anything else. As unless you have experienced this first hand you simply cannot understand it! Xx

Im so sorry you had to go through this, how absolutely awful. People have no idea. When I had my miscarriage multiple people told me everything happens for a reason, like…? I wish I had the balls to say the same thing when they lose their grandpa etc.

@CeeCee me too, I found myself getting frustrated that I or my partner didn’t say anything in the moment but I suppose you don’t since it’s a shock that someone would say something like that. I know people mean well and wouldn’t never want to cause upset but I wish people would think before they speak just saying “I’m so sorry this happened to you”is enough sometimes

I'm so sorry you had to go through this 😔

Horrible comment. I'm so sorry. They should have ended at Sorry. Try to ignore them. They don't understand. Anyone who hasn't experienced it will never understand. Sending you a hug. Your daughter's life was meaningful and important. Her life mattered. She will always be a part of you.

*hugs for you* and a prayer for your healing!!

Totally insensitive. People who have never experienced loss just will never understand the pain and agony. It’s devastating to say the least. I’m sorry you have to go through this my bf is the same way it’s like he just doesn’t get it as well. From one loss mama to another I get it. And your not alone😔❤️

I lost my son at 27w5d and it is the worst thing I ever went through. My husbands elder family members kept saying don't worry you'll get another one. And when I said its not a doll that you replace its really insensitive to say rubbish like that I would be told that they're old and they don't realise. But surely its a problem because no one mentions anything to them?!?

@Sonia so true, we make excuses for other peoples incentive comments, older age being one of them! I’m sorry for your loss too lovely xx

In my experience I think it’s partly a generational thing. Older people seem much more likely to say things like ‘life goes on’, possibly because they were of the ‘brush it under the carpet’ and don’t talk about your feelings era

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