Tantrum or autistic meltdown
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I suppose I just worry. I'm trying to be a somewhere near gentle parent without being ridiculous about it but also my husband starts being I think too harsh like setting timers and taking his food if he's messing around. I try abd explain the consequence of what will happen if he doesn't eat then simulate another scenario nearby
It sounds normal to me, but also the different parenting styles between you both could also be adding to your childs reactions
So far sounds pretty normal typical toddler to me but also saying that maybe right down in a book that is common for autism and once get to a certain amount then get evaluated since dad has autism wee man could also get it but it's 50/50
My eldest has autism came from his dad's side of family my 2nd and 3rd don't have it (2nd and 3rd have different dad to my 1st)
Firstly I wouldn't say any 3 year old can regulate well, that something that develops over the next decade with our support. Sending a child away to their room gives the message that they have to deal with their emotions alone, and when it already feels too big, that's likely to going to help. To be honest it sounds like the issue is not being heard and developmentally children are experimenting with 'no' and preferences at that age. In that example Dad unfortunately didn't hear his no and your little one has reacted with anger to let you know his boundary has been crossed. To me this is a behavioural thing routed in communication around attachment. The world is keen to pathologist children at present and actually most of the time it's children finding their way, parents too...😂 It's a dance!
Often it's talked about how ASD people stim when feeling strong emotions, but actually we all stim it's just to what extent. Swimming helps to regulate everyone so some methods used to help ASD will naturally help non-ASD. Smoking is a stim, biting nails, drinking wine too 😉
Honestly sounds like a pretty typical toddler! They are learning how people respond to their actions and they want to see how much control they have so they push boundaries plus if they are overwhelmed this can cause meltdowns very common with toddlers! And for that age those kind of methods are honestly great with all toddlers not just sn kids! Obviously you know him though so if you see other signs you could look into it, but that sounds like pretty normal toddler stuff!