My BD Wants me to bin all my kids toys

So basically my BD is really into podcast and doom scrolling mad finding thing of the internet that he wholeheartedly agrees with. For example he believes that my kids should be fed vegetables etc. So from this he's basically said they should only be able to have 2 toys and the rest need to go in the bin. To that I responded I have already donated 3 big bags of toys since it's coming up to Christmas so things are pretty bare. The. He said no I need to get rid of all of it and started going on and on at me. They I mentioned about Xmas and said what presents are you getting for Xmas and he said none they shouldn't have any I responded no to that he said just get things they already have and wrap one each up for them to play with and that's that. The he started going on at me about money bearing in mind that all birthday and Christmas presents trips out food clothes etc all come sour of my pocket he never pays a penny he didn't even come to his son's 2nd birthday. I just feel like this is really unfair on the kids. I have already bought them Xmas presents which he is going to lose on me but what else am I meant to do.

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What is the rationale behind 2 toys only?? I mean he didn’t even go to the 2nd birthday so that says it all. HE should get into the bin.

He's gonna lose on you? What do you mean? This sounds really effed up. I'd be looking out for other warning signs like this could be the start of some really weird strict controlling shit. If he doesn't contribute why on earth is he having a say in how you want to gift them? Why doesn't he want to make his kids smile? This sounds rather scary. For context what ways does he interact with them and make them happy and teach them? About the vegetables, they should be fed them.. but do you mean he wants them to have a vegan diet?

@Tiffany we aren't together anymore due to him being very controlling and making me feel like shit all the time. No he doesn't interact I have to force him to interact with the kids and he will only spend time with them if I'm there if I'm not there he passes them onto his mum who call me and evil witch to my kids( for context he cheated on me while I was pregnant with my 1st I stayed to try and work things out it didn't and ever since she hates me for ending the relationship and giving the kids a broken home) he says that they don't need anything because they need to learn how to be without nothing. For the diet he only wants them to eat meat that's it he will not let them have anything else because it is apparently unhealthy and if I give them something else such as vege, pie, a Sunday dinner, pasta etc he gets on at me how it's unhealthy and I'm basically poisoning them which is ridiculous. Like for example I have a dairy allergy and he says it will go away if I eat a yogurt because online posts

@Bee he said only 2 because originally he said none and I said that's unfair we can't do that to them and he said 2 then one each end of. No he didn't turn up to his birthday doesn't get either of them presents or cards every year either.

Incredibly disturbing and I'm glad he doesn't spend time alone with them. I wouldn't want him to. Sadly sounds like you'll have to do a lot of compensating for his bad parenting. Sometimes no Dad is better than a bad one. :/ i would be documenting all of this behaviour of his. I would not leave my kid with people who are badmouthing me. They're obviously not responsible caregivers to do that! So unfair to the children.

@Tiffany Yeah ik luckily I hide all that from them so they don't really see any of it. Yeah I gave him the option I said if you don't want to be here,don't I said from the start of he didn't want the baby then I would raise it by myself and he keeps saying he wants to be involved but then when I say anything like I've had a hard day today he'll be like you chose to have them. I have been keeping logs. I just keep praying that one day he will realise what he's doing it's just hard as I have no support network around me so I feel stuck sometimes

Hi, my big immediate tip (without reading all the comments) is get jumbo sized ziplocks and bag up toys that are like eachother (cars in one bag, people figures in another, food toys in another, etc) it keeps toys from spreading every where all at once & forces kids to slow down and decide which bag they want to open & you guys can pack them back up together when your done

@Parker 又 it's not regarding mess everything is organised toys wise like that he just thinks they shouldn't have any to play with even tho they are only 2 and 1

That’s quite odd.

@Parker 又 yeah exactly my thoughts

I would just start asking for proof from peer reviewed studies and reliable sources. TikTok and fb reels don't count. he's delusional if he thinks a child can only survive and grow by eating meat. take him to a doc appt and have him run these ideas by the doc and watch the doc look at him like he's delusional

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