Am I spoiling my baby too much?

You can't spoil a 9 week old baby! Sorry but it sounds like your husband is the problem here...

What an unsupportive and disrespectful man! So sorry you have to put up with this :( It infuriates me when a good woman is treated badly. I think you are not spoiling your baby and you are being an amazing and caring mum! ❤️

Aw I’m sorry you’re feeling like he’s not being supportive . But is there anyway u can get a bedside bassinet? Those are lifesavers and easier to train baby to sleep independently as they sit over ur bed with you. But I would definitely correct your husband pretty quickly and tell him ur babe is NOT a brat and is NOT spoiled! She’s new to the world and is scared, you were once this way too He would anger me so bad 😂 But I wanna make ur life easier so at least put the bassinet beside ur bed if u can

I’m a midwife… you cannot spoil a baby. They don’t have the brain capacity to manipulate you. They have needs which they need meeting and sometimes the need is a cuddle or just the warmth of their parent x

You can’t spoil a baby, they are either happy being put down or they aren’t, you can’t train it when they’re that small. See if you can get a baby bouncer or rocker as mine won’t go down on his back but is usually good for 15 mins in a bouncer as he can look around.

You poor thing! The idea that a 9 week old is a brat is so ridiculous. I do not understand why there are husbands that think they know better than mum's. And it's not like he's looked up this on the internet as he will only find that you can't spoil a baby. Here is a good website that you can send your husband https://www.nhs.uk/start-for-life/baby/baby-basics/baby-myths-and-facts/ I know that early days are really hard for dads as effectively they are surplus to requirements with the actual baby (especially if you EBF) and not the centre of attention at all. I wish that they could deal with this but i know becoming a mum was such a shock to the system so it must be the same for a Dad. Hopefully with time he'll get his head around it.

You cuddle your baby as much as you want

Definitely cuddle your baby as much as you want. It sounds like your husband perhaps wasn’t cuddled much as a child!! And so that’s why he thinks that’s how one should leave a baby! I’m really sorry he’s not being supportive. My partner has expressed that he is sometimes sad so it does happen that I seem to be able to console our baby better than him and I encourage him and tell him he’s doing a great job but he has been supportive and is very open. It’s not me, there are times when I also cannot settle our little one but we have to work as a team. Maybe try and sit down with him when baby is asleep and chat to him about it. Tell him you are worried that he is upset and explain how normal it is. You are amazing and you got this 💪💪

As an alternative opinion, I do have friends who always is a number one parent and always allow their baby to fall asleep on her so now the baby is used to mom and doesn’t seem to like dad that much at 3 years old. I think it’s important to have a balance between mom and dad (if possible) and also the cot if you want to avoid co sleeping in the future as sometimes it does happen due to the baby sleeping only on the mom. Husband saying the baby is a brat - is a big red flag to me tho

@Polina just to share the experience of my 2 year old and our groups of friends... I let my little boy sleep on me for most of his first 6 months and he still likes me but for the last 3 months at least Daddy is definitely is favourite- he says 'Mummy go!' and points to the door to me because he wants Daddy to do bedtime 🤣. I know at least 3 other mums who just had contact naps for ages like us and they have all had stages where Mummy is favourite and then Daddy is. I agree about the cot (if people don't want to co sleep). I was able to transition my little boy to go to sleep by himself in a cot but not until he was quite a lot older- probably 6 months at least. All babies are different though but the first 3 months they tend to want their mum because they've been so used to them for the previous 9 months.

@Marianne that’s good to know! I agree that some phases go away, I guess depending on family dynamics too. Thank you for sharing. I will let the friend know with that three year old that maybe the mummy phase will be over soon and to cherish it for now 🤪

What does he know about raining a baby? 🙄