My husband walked out on me and baby for the day and he’s staying a hotel tonight. He’s also ignoring all forms of communication except to tell me he’s away for tonight.

I’m not married but I can say married or not I wouldn’t be going for that! Sorry he’s treating you and baby that way 😢

Sounds like you won't even miss him if you do all the childcare anyway. Good riddance, take some space and reassess in the morning

Yes, that’s grounds for divorce 100%. Your HUSBAND walked out and refused to communicate with you? When you have a 1 year old? Throw the whole man in the trash

Why did he leave? Why is he refusing to communicate? How can he justify that as a reasonable response?

Its hard to say without more context on what happened in the lead up to this. Did you both have a bust up and this was his response? If thats the case - whilst unfair and unsupportive it can be worked on, just depends on: - What it was about - i.e. was it a big disagreement about something serious where things getting heated is warranted? - Is this a common theme? How often does he do this? - What was your part to play in the lead up to him leaving? Was there things you also could have done differently and if so are you willing to admit that to yourself? People are quick to put their 2 cents in about a partner being 'no good', but we all make mistakes sometimes. Understanding why is half the battle and if its something you BOTH want to change. Finding healthy ways to argue is so important - my husband & I had some toxic patterns in arguments that were explosive, it took time & work to change this but was worth it. (It may not be the same for you, not excusing your hubby, just need more context)

Why does he need to stay in a hotel on a weekend and refuse communication?💀 not to be dramatic or assume but sounds like a cheating situation to me.

Thanks mamas for the support. Honestly it was so much easier taking care of baby solo and with my mother’s help with cooking dinner. Baby went to bed at a reasonable time and no evening meltdowns.

I’m seeing a therapist for myself soon, and we also need to find a couples therapist. I’m not sure yet what the root cause of the arguments are. But the arguments are frequent and usually over the fact that he causes baby to have frequent meltdowns, which makes me very VERY stressed out. I tell him to do things that doesn’t cause these meltdowns, with stress and frustration in my voice, and he tries to argue with me that his intentions are good, and then we end up arguing at least a couple times every week. I have no idea if I sound crazy typing this out, but I seriously get so stressed with the way he handles baby.

@Tiara no way. That would be silly of him…

Yeah, I just don’t understand the hotel thing-just sleep on the couch at that point

Sounds like my situation but my hubs sleeps in the spare room or couch because he doesn’t want to be woken up at 1 am when baby wakes up to move out of bed ( he thinks there’s not enough room for three of us ) Dm me if you need to chat

He sounds like a selfish narc 😵 and those don't change

Depends why he needs space.. I wouldn’t be mad, just concerned for him. He has let you know he is ok and where he is, maybe wait to have a conversation with him before jumping to conclusions.

Ok this makes a lot more sense now. Couples therapy sounds like a great idea. It seems like mainly a communication issue where you both have different ways of reacting in a fight and ideally you want to go from being 'reactive' to responsive to eachother. Reactions are emotionally heated whereas responsive is you both being able to pause, focus on the others needs/view and have empathy so you can respond and get your point across in a way that addresses both your feelings. My husband has to pause and walk away from a situation sometimes whereas I like to handle it right then and there, but ive learnt if we do that its explosive. He needs to calm down and reflect, so now I let him go in his study or whatever and cool off but he comes back apologises and tries to see my point of view an hour or so later when hes less emotional so we actually get the issue resolved with less blow ups! When hes home maybe try explain how him leaving made you feel in a way that doesnt sound like an attack to open up a convo ❤️

@Shiv thank you. I need to think about what you said. And to the other equally supportive manas here, I needed to hear the burn him at the stake sentiment too ❤️❤️❤️ I am so incredibly angry at him for walking out yesterday

No problem, Id absolutely be angry too. Its an immature and unfair way to deal with the situation for sure. Hopefully the space helped you both though and I really hope it gets better. I know what its like to be in that space, and it is utterly exhausting fighting all the time. Feel free to DM me for anything ☺️

This gave me flashbacks of my ex. He would do this or go to his “grandmas” to get away… come to find out his grandma wasn’t alive and he was cheating 😞 he told me time and time again he just needed the space and time to clear his head for his mental health and all I could do was trust him till I found out otherwise.

@Roksan heavy on the bin! 🤢😑 unacceptable

@Shiv totally agree with this, there has to be so much more to consider before advising someone to get a divorce.