Sleep training!!

No judgement at all, just words of support that your instinct to support your baby to sleep with hands on head/face/back is totally right and totally normal ❤️❤️

Baby’s cannot be taught to self soothe!!! It’s a load of insta BS perpetuated by the industry that has sprung up around sleep training. Baby’s self soothe when they’re developmentally ready to do so - some are super young, some are much older.

Have a look at the studies that show a baby’s cortisol levels during CIO. Eventually, the baby settles and the parents assume that the baby has self soothed. But in reality, their cortisol levels are still as high as if they were actively crying.

Dependence leads to independence… all you can do is support your little one in finding their ways to self settle.

Keep doing what feels most natural to you, and your baby will get there when they’re ready

Get in touch with a sleep consultant. I used CIO with a help of a sleep consultant when my baby was 6 months old and he has been sleeping through the night since then from 7pm - 7am.
CIO means that you are not going in at all. Going in every 2/3mins just got her wound up more and more.
I paid £160 for my sleep consultant and it was totally worth it for me.

100% agree with everything Sally has said.
Some babies are more naturally soothers and others signallers, so much of this is down to their temperament and how sensitive they are.
It’s SO normal for them to need support to fall asleep, or to fall back asleep if they wake at night- my 3yo still has support to fall asleep. And so ‘not the norm’ to be absolutely content being put down awake and left alone, or put down drowsy but awake and left alone, or whatever else sleep trainers would have you believe is the gold standard for sleep.

That all said, if you are okay with CIO, then what Xenia said is true, “extinction training” is about not popping in at all to check on them. Ferber, or controlled crying, is when you check at intervals. Even then- for some babies this “works”, and for others it doesn’t/wont. And if she’s so distressed she vomits, you may just have yourself a normal, attached, reassurance-seeking baby that isn’t going to cope with such extreme methods.

Perhaps trying something more gradual would work better for her?

Thanks for all advice!!! We’ll have to see how we do! Not a fan of CIO myself but thought I’d give it ago! Not again, maybe when she’s older 🤷🏼‍♀️ xx

I slept with my baby up until a week ago she’s nearly 1

She’s too active to be in bed with me I found everytime I put her in her cot by her self I would be in a similar situation she’d just cry and cry I started getting in her cot with her and giving her bottle some nights it goes smoother than other but being inside the cot with her, helped her and I’d get out 10 mins into her sleep

Hope maybe this trick can help you xx

I used the Ferber method but never went longer than 5 minutes.
Personally it worked with my boy. He went from crying awake every 2 hours of the night to just going from 8pm to 7am with maybe 1-2 murmers in the night where he’d fall asleep himself. The best but is putting him in the cot awake and walking away knowing he’ll be asleep in a minute or so.
BUT if he’s ill he’s back in bed with me and we retrain after.
He usually takes 2-3 nights to retrain.

One tip I would ask you is have you given your baby a soft teddy of some sort? It’s got to be safe for sleeping so no parts that could smother. I have a bunny with skinny long limbs and ears. My boy will nestle his face into it and fall asleep.

Hi, in my opinion nobody should ever do cry it out method. But each to their own… I sleep trained my girl in maybe 2-3 weeks we put her in her bed left the room keep an eye on the monitor and do not go back in to the room unless they’re crying. If they cry go back in pick them up soothe them till they’re calm and or nearly asleep put them back in the cot and repeat. Never go in or pick them up unless they’re crying. It was tedious and it took a good 4-5 nights to take affect but it worked. We did the same with waking in the night after that if she woke for a bottle we would give her the bottle once she’s finished she goes straight back in the cot leave until she cries and most nights she would just go straight back to sleep. Now she’s 10 months old I put her in bed at half 7-8 ish and she will put herself to sleep, if she wakes in the night she can put her dummy back in and get herself back to sleep❤️