Am I being mean!?

My 7 month old girl is on move fully and wanna put everything in her mouth. There was art done by my 5 year old for his friend. He had a car drawn using marker and crayons and he was showing that another friend today evening. That piece of paper was on the couch, it was almost bed time and I wanted to use the restroom so I gave the baby to my husband and went. I came back in 2 minutes and my husband and kids were screaming that baby chewed that paper. Baby’s mouth fully blue color and tongue was heavily stained. I started asking why don’t you be careful while watching the baby and as the TV was playing, I asked were watching TV instead of Baby? And then I started cleaning her mouth. He kept shouting that he didn’t do anything wrong and started screaming to son for keeping that paper there also kept shouting I was being wrong for finger pointing. I wasn’t finger pointing, I only asked out of anxiety why he wasn’t careful? All I expected in that moment is, calming me down and telling that the baby is okay. Instead it became a big fight and saying I am being mean.

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Totally understand your point! Men are idiots to be honest.they get defensive other small things. It takes forever to understand things after a long while he will realize he was the responsible instead of the being the victim. So, the only thing I can advise you here is that we have to have patience with them until they decide to get it. Please, talk to him calmly when everything is going well so maybe he will do better next time. I’ll tell you bc I’m living this experience

He's just mad he got caught not paying attention. Just because he's got no one else to blame doesn't mean he won't try to blame you, your son... whoever. Don't fall for it. Tell him "We both saw baby with her mouth all blue. We both know how close of attention you were paying. I'm going to let it go, just do better next time." And drop it, it's small potatoes. If he goes on about you being mean, tell him not to double down on his mistakes. There's no reason for him to turn one problem (not watching baby) into two (starting a fight with you). Tell him there are no winners here, when you get caught up in these arguments, you both lose. These things happen. Try not to let them get you both off track. Good luck. 🍀

You are not wrong it’s dad’s fault for not watching! Your son is 5 he doesn’t have the ability to predict possible risks

I've started openly expressing/explaining to my husband when my reaction is anxiety driven, not anger or blame driven. Because we kept getting into arguments over small things like this. He felt I was being mean and judgemental and I am just dealing with mom anxiety. So now I will add things like "I'm not mad, I'm anxious." "I'm not blaming you I'm trying to sort what happened to know how to handle/react to it." It's helped us alot and he's started recognizing anger vs anxiety more without needing to be told.

He’s mad at you for finger pointing but he was doing the same thing to his 5 year old?

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