How to announce boundaries

34 weeks pregnant and feeling like baby may come early.. I would really like to put some boundaries in place for when baby is born such as i only want my partner in the hospital and i would like atleast a week untill visitors come to see baby.. maybe even longer depending on how i feel. my partner has no issue with this.. However my i feel my partners parents are going to be very inconsiderate and disrespect my boundaries or make me feel bad for wanting them by using excuses like “we are all excited not just you” or “we are the grandparents” as they do come off as those type of people.. how do i announce the boundaries i would like put in place.. and how do i deal with them being challenged..?

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It's it's your partner's parents then he should be the one communicating with them about this, just tell them you are so excited for them to meet the little one but you'd really like some time alone as a new family because you need to rest and recover from the birth, establish feeding etc (whether breast or bottle you still need time to figure it out), and you'll all be so much happier for visitors if you have that time. I wish I'd be stricter with my first, I was so out of it I allowed anyone to come over. So, if I were you I'd settle this now, you'll be vulnerable after x

This is you and your partners baby, nobody is entitled to push any boundaries regardless of their titles! It’s hard putting boundaries in place, I get it. I’d ask your partner to speak with them, say we are choosing not to have any visitors until X amount of days including the hospital and that although you understand they will be eager to meet baby yous would like to have time to adjust as a family first. X

If it’s his parents he needs to put the boundary in place and make it clear that these are his wishes too otherwise the parents may think “she’s keeping us away from the baby” if you see what I mean. If they turn up at the door you don’t have to let them in. If they don’t respect it from now then it’s better to find out sooner rather than later because they need boundaries from early before they start babysitting and causing any more issues

I hope your partner reinforces your boundaries to his family.

Me and my partner have had the same convo and I’ve essentially hinted to my family, and he’s said he will discuss it with his. And nearer the time we will reiterate it and i think as long as you’re both agreeing to it as a couple, you can stand strong as a two if those boundaries get challenged. I do think he should do it not you, so it doesn’t look like you’ve enforced it alone, it will show he is putting a boundary in place and if they kick off its his family so him to deal with it! In terms of it being challenged, for me my reasons are: RSV/illnesses, recovery, wanting our alone time as a new family unit, midwife apts, and also because its our child and we say so ☺️ shouldn’t even need justifying but those would be my responses

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