Am I overreacting - hosting Christmas

We just hosted Christmas lunch potluck for our family (my husband’s immediate family and my parents). We host every year but this is the first year I’m a FTM with a 6 month old. I’m here to vent… I didn’t want to host at first but my husband convinced me “we won’t cook/prep anything” I was naive. He thinks the house cleans itself 😒 On top of that I forgot my baby’s 6M appointment was Christmas Eve. And she got some vaccines so she’s understandably not feeling the best and had some fever. She was clingy last night and woke frequently. Even if we don’t have to cook or prep anything, my husband doesn’t realize that we still have to tidy the house, clean the floor, put out tables and chairs etc. so I spent Christmas Eve doing that, and tended to baby’s post vaccine clinginess. I didn’t go to sleep til 1am. My husband did help but he only did when I asked him to. Also even if he said we don’t have to prep he did not exactly arrange for his younger brother to set up table and chairs and stuff. So guess who is doing it—we are. So my MIL said you look tired and I told her I went to bed late last night cause cleaning up and preparing the house. She then asked my mom (when I was elsewhere), twice, why am I so tired; what’s there to do (I already told her what I had to do). I’m annoyed. Before we got pregnant she said she’d help with baby but since baby was born she never once offered to help with baby (she does cook and deliver us meals here and there which is nice— we need every bit of help). Baby doesn’t even know her cause whenever she holds my baby she’d cry. One time in conversation she said she just let her kids (she had 3) cry to sleep and feed them once in a while. She said it’s no big deal. She also once said I coddle my baby too much, I’m just making my own life difficult. I just feel like that’s her excuse to not help cause it’s my fault this is how I want to take care of my baby and it’s not her problem. I don’t expect her to help, but just not super trustworthy to have said one thing and then do another. And I don’t appreciate the comments behind my back. Am I overreacting or are these feelings valid?