What are the opinions

I am going to be a single mother for the second time. First time I was with my daughters dad and we broke after she was born, this time it’s a hard one we’re not together for reasons like timing and situation but love each other it’s hard as we said we wanted kids with each other but not yet and it’s now happened while we aren’t together and don’t live close by each other. I’ve said I want to keep the baby and he’s said he doesn’t want to keep the baby and won’t change his mind but I only told him today. I’m not sure what to say to him I’ve said I want to keep it, I just know single motherhood wasn’t the plan for the second time round. Definitely disappointed in myself

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Be gentle and kind to yourself. This is a decision only you can make. My ex put me in this position also. I was with him for 6.5 years. I miscarried in 2020 at 13 weeks (didn’t know until I was MC and I was on birth control so wasn’t planned). I changed from implant to pill to ensure it didn’t happen again and we both grieved but moved on together. We were in a rough patch when I found out I was pregnant in Oct 2022. He was cheating with SEVERAL women🫠. I called him out on it and told him about the pregnancy. I was 4 weeks or so at this point. We tried to work things out relationship wise and also baby wise. I still didn’t know what I wanted. I didn’t feel ready to be a mum but after the loss, couldn’t bring myself to agree to an abortion, although I did seriously consider it for a number of weeks. In the end, he gave me the ultimatum and I walked. My stance was that I might regret the abortion in future, but I’d never regret having my son

*couldn’t fit it all in one* - We’ve been no contact since and it was rough to start with but I’m now living in my own place, entirely independent and absolutely thriving, just my son and I. He’s the best thing that has ever happened to me and in hindsight, I can’t believe it ever took me so long to choose him over my ex..and I’d choose my son over anyone, no matter what. I’d suggest you take some time to yourself, to think about what YOU want and how it will work for YOU. Don’t let him dictate how you think or your feelings towards another child. If having another isn’t right for you then that is your choice but only you should be making this decision. Single motherhood is TOUGH but it is also survivable AND enjoyable. Please feel free to message me, as a fellow single mama who’s been through the trenches 💛🫶🏻

@Courtney aweee I’m sorry you went though that ❤️ . I kinda relate in a different but similar kinda way we’re before having my first I thought I was infertile and swore I’d never have an abortion and that’s kinda my exact stance right now I don’t want to live with the daily regret and i know I would regret it. There’s just so much in my head rn it’s scaring me.

@Courtney omg sorry only just seen the second half ! I’m struggling with the fact I have no village for my first son and I know a lot of people do it without a village just scared for two without that village while knowing I want this baby 😩 and thankyou so much for the advice i appreciate it so much ❤️

I questioned whether to keep my current pregnancy. Me and bd were not in a great position but like Courtney I didn’t want to make a decision I’d regret. I kept the baby and recently got rid of bd (for many reasons including cheating, gaslighting, social isolation, manipulation, mental/emotional/fiancial and then physical abuse while I was pregnant). I left in November with my two boys (2 & 1) and currently 31wks pregnant. It’s not been easy and he’s making it much harder. But I know I’ve made the best decision for my kids and myself. I know as hard as it will be I won’t/don’t regret my babies or my decisions ❤️

@Sharnee yeah I think imma be similar I think I’m going to just completely ignore him at this point because he’s being very insensitive now and I’ve known for a while he’s very narcissistic so it’s hard

I’m really sorry you’re dealing with that. It’s definitely a tough situation. Feel free to reach out if you need or want to chat xx