Baby calm at MILs but not at home
Show your support
Unfortunately for us, babies and toddlers feel safest with their mums so let out their emotions with us. It’s probably just that your baby was holding it in with your MIL. My in laws always claim that my toddler sleeps through with them but tbh I wonder if they just don’t hear if he wakes sometimes. My baby will also sleep in MIL’s arms but is hard to settle in mine and I can only put this down to him smelling milk on me lol. I know this isn’t helpful for you as it doesn’t help with him being unsettled at home, but hard as it is, try not to take it personally!
Thankyou both for replying! I know it’s not his fault as he’s just a baby but that means that I immediately blame myself as that’s just how I work! My midwife did suggest the theory that they only let their true emotions out with their primary caregivers a while ago as he has always been calm with my MIL. It’s just hard to understand I suppose as if we didn’t feel 100% comfortable we wouldn’t act happy and calm! I also think babies can sense your emotions, his MIL has done this 3 times before and is pretty chill whereas I’m a very anxious person so I do wonder if he senses that and that makes him anxious too 😞
Bless you, it’s soo tough being a mumma! I completely agree with Rosie that your little one will see you as their safe space and therefore you get all the emotions… good and bad! They may also pick up on your emotions so if you’re stressed about them getting upset they’ll feel that! Hold on in there, you’re doing a great job 💛
Sorry, just to add… others tend to say that bubba was good for them just for your peace of mind! They don’t tend to tell you if baby was unhappy!xx
Aww I'm so sorry it's hard for you! My boy cries in the evenings sometimes for apparently no reason and I get the feeling of not being able to settle them. I also do think people say baby has been good for them when they probably have had a period of crying. My parents tell me mines been fine but I know he wouldn't have as when they're here he cries when with them. He won't just not cried or fussed for all those hours. I don't want you to feel worried if he has been unsettled with them, but also for you to know he won't just be unsettled with you! As the above says they often feel safe with you to play up a little as well. It's really tough but try remember it will pass and often with the crying it sounds worse than what it is, I just try tell myself it's their only way of communicating xx
My mum always says babies are more fussy with their mothers because they can smell the milk (if you're breastfeeding). They also regulate from you so if, as someone said earlier, you're stressed then he might be picking up on that. You are doing a great job! Never forget that you are his favourite person in the whole world :)
Thanks very much everyone this makes me feel better ☺️
I would say it is probably luck. You are doing a great job, don't feel bad he settles better with other people. I find my son either settles with me or nothing I do works and my partner can do it instantly. You will find your own way, and it does get easier, it's still very early days, you can do this. (And no judgement on leaving him for the night, if I wasn't breastfeeding and I had this offer I would love a night of uninterrupted sleep!)