Home visits

First time mum ! Have been adjusting pretty well to caring for newborn 24/7 and lack of sleep. I don’t know if it’s just my area but the home visit midwives are sometimes turning up when we haven’t been told we’re having a visit or not showing on a day we’ve been told we’ll have a visit for example we expected a visit Sunday no one arrived we called and were told someone will arrive they didn’t called again Monday told someone will arrive and someone turned up while we were asleep yesterday morning. I don’t know if I’m just being sensitive and hormonal but I’m finding it invasive and unfair I need to sleep when baby sleeps and take baby outside for walks for my mental health but I feel constantly on edge someone might turn up does anyone know if this is normal practice or why this happens ? Looking for reassurance even if it’s to tell me I’m just being crazy thank you x

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They shouldn't be turning up without letting you know. Just do what you need to do. If you're out, then you're out it is their fault for not informing you of the time/day. X

They did this to me, literally not even 24 hours after I had given birth and then when she had her 5 day check, i literally was so exhausted, she turned up so early unexpectedly, I don’t know why they just rock up whenever or don’t tell you but it’s happened to me too x

Same happened to be on day 5 was by first day home and finally managed to get a nap in and woke to a phone call saying they will be their in 10 mins. Even when I rang them at 8am the other day to get help, they said they would call be back and I still haven’t received a call back and it’s been over 7 days. There is no communication between hospital, midwife/health visits and doctors. Complete disorganise. I say if you’re not aware of the appointment and your out tell them no and carry on with your day. Tell them to make an appointment for another day.

Yes this has happened to us. Most of the midwives have rung me to let me know they’re on the way but some don’t. The other day we were out for a walk and I got a call from the midwife who was literally outside our door, I told her we were out and wouldn’t be back for another half an hour, so she came back the next day instead and made me feel bad for going for a walk as I’m still recovering from a c-section. I hate not knowing when they’re coming.

Okay I just started to think maybe other families are up and dressed early every morning and not leaving the house with a baby as they are speaking to me like I’m the one unorganised and missing appointments I think it’s completely out of order to knowingly go to someone’s house without giving any notice especially first thing in the morning

Hahaha early morning! I’m not even dressed until noon and that’s if I’m lucky. They are out of order. They are the ones who don’t care. They just try fit us in like numbers in a book. Don’t feel like they are there to help at all.

To me it’s perpetuating some kind of gross internalised misogyny vibe with this narrative of the mother who is always ready keeps up appearances doesn’t take the newborn outside for a month and stays in housekeeping

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