Desperately in need for some help

We potty trained our daughter in May 2024. But could never crack the poo, she would always ask for a nappy. Which of course at the time we never discouraged because she wasn’t a regularly girl and was always so constipated and it hurt her less to stand than sit. But now the new year has hit and school is approaching. I’ve recently been in contact with the doctor which has put her on some laxatives which will soften the poos to hopefully encourage more of the use of the toilet. It’s been 5 days and she is so desperate for a poo but is soooo adamant that she wants a nappy. I stay true to myself and keep putting her in the toilet and also offering the potty. She goes and tries but when it’s about to happen she gets scared and says “it’s gone back in my body now”. So we then encourage her again in 5 minutes. Shes so desperate that she keeps running to the toilet not yet doing anything. We’ve tried the sweet bribe, surprise bribe, songs, books, tv, and abdominal massages but she just won’t let it out. Any advice of how I should go about it. I don’t want her to hold herself that she hurts herself. Doctors told me to persist and it will eventually just come out but I also don’t want to traumatise her. Any helping advice?

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My daughter was the same. Only wanted to poo in a pullup. Insisted on pooing in them. In the end I went cold turkey and hid them. But said once the pull ups were gone. No more. Took some positive no pressure. She eventually pooed on the potty. So proud of herself and she had a doll she wanted as a present. Potty training took about nearly a year with the poo side. But now 4 she's been pooing confidently on the toilet for a while now. Just started using toilet without kids seat. You will get there, it's feels like it won't happen but it will. All you can do is encourage and don't stress. She'll get there in the end. 🙂

* positive encouragement. I get also about the constipation too. As that makes it worse. Try get her reading or make it fun. Bubbles calm breathing?

ERIC is a good site to visit https://eric.org.uk/potty-training/

@Kat I just feel so awful because she just cries. But also shows excitement. I say just try and then if it’s not coming we will try again later. She’s very clever and knows I’m trying to negotiate, and will turn down everything I say. Ive explained no more nappies which are pull ups but she just keeps holding. I will persist and eventually she will have to go but I just get the worst mum guilt ever x

I think there are potty training books you can get that specifically discuss poos and help to get little one familiar with the thought of doing them on the potty

My daughter was the same way so we completely took away the pull-ups and had her wear underwear. She’d go in the underwear but hated the feeling and would take the poop out and hand it to us. We got her to put it in the toilet herself and she eventually started going on the toilet

Have you tried “everyone poops” book. My kids loved it so much I feel like it got them comfortable with the word and the idea of poop. Also “oh crap potty training” has an entire chapter on poop. I wish I remembered the specifics.

Try asking on Potty training toddlers group on FB. They have been so helpful just looking at the questions and answers :)

.. could you put a pull up in a potty, probably easiest in those potty pots or somehow tucked under a potty seat? Idk this could be more trouble than it’s worth but like some sort of compromise, and explain its only for a few times ? Idk I think I’m over complicating it but I’d be desperate if my LO wasn’t pooing I’m sorry I hope you get some helpful tips and she gets some much needed relief

Hello, we have a WhatsApp group, message me if any of you mums want to join. We are definitely a mixed bunch so there is always someone who has got advice. Definitely the best group I’ve found x

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