if someone has a hoarding problem (not just clutter but filth) and they refuse to get help, their kids and animals should be removed from the home.
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There’s a limit to giving the benefit of the doubt regarding mental health. When it negatively affects your kids, there’s the limit. Be proactive in getting help as it isn’t just for you but those you love most
I dated a dude.. he took me to his home to meet his parents and his house was insanely disgusting. Couldn’t walk without filth by your feet. Dogs shitting everywhere not being picked up. The kitchen had food EVERYWHERE. I dont like to judge because at the time I get it we moved a lot as a kid and my mom worked a lot so it was cluttered but I never lived in filth. It was truly something I’ve never seen before. Anytime I walked near that house I wanted to THROW up. They raised a truly lazy kid even though the mom was super sweet the dad was a lazy pig. She worked constantly and it didn’t help her son never cleaned up after himself. He was a pathological liar but on top of that filthy. I left that relationship fast. I also had a good friend whose parents never cleaned either he was ashamed of it though he helped clean but it would go back the way it was because his parents didn’t give a shit and he would be blamed for it. It happens a lot more than you think. It’s really sad.
Honestly I think you shouldn’t have kids if you want them to live in filth. I understand being overwhelmed even depression but your kids come first in these instances. And putting your kid in a situation that can even be somewhat traumatic is just not okay. If it gets that bad you need to get help. Clutter is different than filth for sure. But if you have mold in your home and food everywhere cant even walk through it and it reeks you need to reevaluate yourself and your life.
There’s a cleaning lady I follow on IG, she recently cleaned a home where a woman and her 6yo daughter lived with 2 cats. She removed over 1000 2 litre bottles of piss from 1 room. There was cat poo everywhere, black mould, you name it. They both slept in one quarter of a filthy bed. I was so surprised that nobody had called Social Services from the child’s school because there’s no way that child had clean clothes or was eating properly. Their fridge was full of mouldy food and tins/cans were dated back to 2000. I know hoarding is a mental illness. I just don’t see how if you have children, why you would subject them to that. Animals too. It’s cruel. Far better to place your child into care/foster system until you have sought help. As a parent you place your child above everything, so why wouldn’t you do the same for them in this situation?
@Neena were they peeing in bottles? Did they have no toilet?
@Victoria~ yes they were peeing in bottles or at least the mother was. There were also soiled discarded nappies which I’m guessing the 6yo was using. Their bathroom/toilet was inaccessible due to being blocked off with piles of crap and when the cleaner did open the door, the toilet had been filled to the brim with poo……and left. A very sad state of affairs.
@Victoria~ with hoarding they often don’t clean at all so the toilet will end up breaking or the bathroom gets packed with stuff so it’s not accessible. Shitting and peeing in bucks and showering by hose happens. That’s usually when the city gets involved.
Yes. Firstly, I do feel bad for folks in this situation—especially those with stories that pushed them down this direction. I watched this show on TLC and the emotional harm it puts on the children is….its horribly. Many of the relationships have strains with their adult children, so I can’t imagine how the younger ones (minors) feel but can’t do anything about it. Also, having a home that is that filthy is abuse. Having poop, rodents, insects, ect take over your home (where your child eats and sleeps) is wrong. Many of them are aware of this but…that’s that
I know someone who is a hoarder or was I don’t know anymore and I didn’t know when I went to their house. I considered burning my clothes after because of the smell. Kids are not living in hoards and smelling clean.
I’m sorry but as a parent, you have to get your shit together for your child. Kids don’t deserve to live like that because of adult problems. I know what depression is like, not cleaning or wanting to do anything for a day or two is fine. Maybe even 3 but living like that long term, is not okay. I do appreciate lived in homes, there’s a difference between a mess and filth, I’ve seen the show hoarders and its absolutely disgusting.
It’s starting to make its way on to TikTok where mothers live in and show their filthy homes. Cat pee soaked box springs and carpets. All the commenters attack people who say “let’s not normalize kids living like this”. I don’t know how people are not investigated like Neena said.
It’s gross, unsanitary and irresponsible. As @Elannah said, you have to get your shit together. Not to mention how living like that will affect them later on in life.
Hmmmmm I think before the animals and kids get thrown out a few good attempts at trying to clear out the persons home should be made .. booking in a team to do a deep clean for example, a counsellor to help the person detach from their hoarded possessions etc … I just feel like giving animals and kids up is a massive deal, and should be the very last resort x
@Amanda yeah that’s why I specified a refusal to get help. I also don’t think the kids and animals need to be given up rather than need to stay with someone in the family until the person will accept help.
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Saw a 911 call recording recently of a hoarder woman turning herself in and asking for them to come remove her several dogs. She said was sad so she'd get a puppy to make her happy and kept taking in more free dogs but couldn't care for them properly because of her hoarding problems. She thought they were going to arrest her due to animal neglect because of the condition of the home. I'm not sure if they ever did but it takes a lot to admit all of that and to get help, I hope her and her dogs are all in a better place in life now. Anyone who voted no probaby doesn't understand how bad these homes can get.
Kids come first. They deserve a home that ain’t filthy. Get mental help if you need it. Kids shouldn’t suffer.
I was scrolling through and accidentally clicked “I am a hoarder” on this poll. I am cracking up. 😭🤣
Definitely if the help is offered and they refuse. No child should be subjected to those kind of living conditions
I said no because people who qualify as hoarders can still be decent parents/pet owners to the point where the foster system is not a better alternative. Not all hoarders have poop and mold everywhere. Hoarding isn’t good - but there are cases where the average foster care situation is worse. It’s very case by case
I personally think it depends on the level of hoarding. I consider my grandma a hoarder because she buys so much stuff and has it piled everywhere in her house however she doesn't have bugs, poop, mold, expired food, etc. In her house so therefore I'm (for the most part) comfortable with my child being there but if it's really bad like that than absolutely the kids and animals should be taken until that person decides to do better and get their house fixed
If you said no, why? Some peoples hoarder houses have animal and human poop everywhere and mold. Why should anyone be forced to remain in that situation if the person who is causing it won’t change it?