If you had a child with someone who’s mentally abusive to you would you try to raise your child away from?

Uhm I would have to make sure he’s mentally stable to care for child first. If not then I would not trust him with baby

Depends. What's he responsible for legally? Is he on the birth certificate? Are you getting gov assistance? Are you financially ok? Do you NEED his help or do you have a decent support network? Either way (around or not) one day you will have to talk with your child and tell them what's up. If he's not around, are you prepared for child to search for him? Does he have any history being mentally abusive to anyone else or just you? Did you both push eachothers buttons, but he pushed harder? Is there any other abusive he is? (None of these you need to answer to anyone other than yourself, just things to think about)

He should only be watching your child with supervision.

I would assume he's gone. If he wanted to apologise, you're all ears. Further to that, he would need to show you real change if you did let him even back on talking terms with you. Real change in his ways, in his life not between you. Do not restart a relationship without real proof of change. As for your child keep contact minimal and as Marlenny says supervised. Also state that this will stay that way for the foreseeable. The best thing of course would just be to carry on alone. Disappearing for a month is at best odd and childish. And since you said he made your pregnancy miserable, there is factual proof, he will continue making you feel like that if let back in to your life. The begging him to help shows you that he is immature and lacks decisiveness and can't be relied upon and isn't interested in you or the baby plus any help you ever get from him won't be done willingly it will be forced which is never good. I think move on, with your head held high and protect your peace and your baby xx

Currently going through this. He disappeared during the pregnancy and then occasionally hit me up then nothing at all once I went into labor and for months after. Trickle down to my baby being almost 9 months and he texted me. I didn’t even respond. I guess I need advice too. Cause wtf.

Also going through this. He's not on the birth certificate. It's all very much on my terms but he never asks to see his child anyway. He doesn't pay maintenance either. I just don't want him breaking my sons heart so I keep him away. The dad couldn't give two hoots

@Lys ❤️‍🔥 yeah it’s crazy I know that might happen

@Elise me too right now my baby is too small to understand but I have to decide what to do in the future what am I going to tell her when she understands and wonders and if it’s best to keep him away so he won’t do damage