Did your sex life change after you had a natural birth?
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What would you miss out on if you had a natural birth? To answer your questions, my sex life didn’t really change at all! Definitely had to wait the 6 weeks to comfortably try anything.
Regarding sex after a vaginal delivery ( I did have some pain relief , but it was for fatigue more than it was for pain ) We didn't end up having sex until our child was seven months old. It wasn't for lack of interest. I was nervous about my body. Even though he had been right there in the delivery room. I was nervous. Also, I didn't want two under two, so I opted for an IUD to be put in at 12 weeks postpartum. That just got taken out at 16 months postpartum .... But we haven't started trying yet for a few reasons.
I’m unclear what you would be ‘missing out’ on if you had a vaginal delivery? This sounds like a bit of a red flag type of behaviour 🚩
It only changed temporarily. I’m 4 months PP and things are actually 10x better now! Mind you I have 2 children and my body has bounced back both times and my vagina has gone back to normal both times. INCLUDING what pleasures me. This feels super weird for him to be suggesting? Like… birth is birth lol. What has your sexual desires have to do with the birth of your child? Why would that matter? It’s kinda red flag af for him to even be bringing this up. It sounds so controlling and manipulative…
Does it feel the same after birth? I mean, your insides shrink back down to normal, but you need to find yourself again after a baby and that includes finding what you like and what arouses you postpartum. I reccomend to new moms to try diy time to be able to still get aroused and to also be able to better take pride in their postpartum bodies
You don't miss out on anything that I'm aware of.... By having a vaginal delivery. That's how most babies were born before cesarean section was even a thing
No nothing changed at all. I also had different partners between my first and second child and was never insecure about that at all. Do not have a c section because your Husband is worried about you or quite frankly him “ missing out”… that is a load of shit. Vaginas are MEANT to have babies.
Your body , in the cases of most women unless your pelvis is too small.... Was designed to be able to push out a baby
My friend said it affected her sex life, that her vagina never went back to quite its original size and sex was never as good as before. I personally didn't want to take that risk and had an elective C section. The recovery isn't as bad as people say, and the scar isn't bad at all. I have no regrets with it.
I agree with @Jade this seems concerning to me. There are risks for c sections and vaginal deliveries. I’ve had 4 vaginal deliveries-2 with epidurals, 2 without. My recoveries when I didn’t have an epidural were way better. No tears anytime. And my sex life really hasn’t changed since having kids.. it’s a littler harder to make time for it since there’s so many of them and one of them is usually waking up in the middle of the night at some point. But I’m not “missing out” on anything-physically our sex life is the same if not better. Logistically it’s a little harder to find time.
Vaginal birth had absolutely zero impact on sex for me. From both my and my husbands perspective, everything went completely back to normal (it did take months to normalize though - was actually tighter at first with both deliveries). Some women can have complications causing vaginal changes that impact sex, but that is the minority. Sex does change for the majority of women due to hormones and exhaustion - took about 14 months to get back to normal for me following my first (when I stopped pumping and my period came back), still not normal with my second (still bf-ing on demand and period still not back) I totally support however you want to birth, many women love an elective section. However if this is literally the only reason, I’d suggest a vaginal
I still enjoy sex. Absolutely. I still get aroused. Absolutely.... I also have a partner who focuses on me and my pleasure as much as if not more then his own.... And regularly checks in on me .... In sexual activity and in general. And we are also slowly returning to the adult community
The only thing that changed for me was the way my orgasms happened but it didn’t change them happening, if that makes sense?
@Danielle that does make sense, actually
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1. That's major surgery. 2. You'll still bleed even if you don't give birth vaginally. 3. Yes, I still feel pleasure the same way as before. 4. Yes it felt the same as before birth 5. The changes were that my boobs got bigger when my milk came in and we couldn't have sex until after 6 weeks because we were responsible and wanted my body to heal properly before intercourse happened.
There's a book about female pleasure Women's anatomy of arousal: secret maps of buried pleasure ( I think that's the title) I own this book and haven't fully read all of it, but I reccomend it to everyone to read
It was only temporary for both of us. I did kegals and worked out my pelvic floor to bring it back. Everything was more normal around 5 months postpartum. My drive came around 7 weeks 😅 I didn't have any tearing. Sorry that needed to be added.
It depends on the person. Some it changes for. Could be good or bad. Some it's temporary and some it's not. But your partner needs to do more research if he thinks it won't change with a c-section at all. Because it 100% can. I've had 4. My 4th sex actually hurt the first 3 months we were having sex (month 3 through 6) it was at 6 months that I finally started to not hurt any more and could enjoy sex. But there's several women in my group who would tell you it's been a year and they still have pain or they aren't turned on or whatever. Pregnancy in general can change your sex patterns. Hormones are high during that period and all kinds of emotions happen. There's no way to know if your sex life will change after baby or not. And you can't narrow it down to vaginally or c-section either because every woman is different and every woman handles things differently.
Learn your own body. Do diy time with yourself. Read the book I mentioned. Consider a subscription ( it may be a one time payment, but I'm not sure) .... To omgyes... A website devoted to teaching women about their own sexual pleasure. By women Watch porn ! ( Gasp, I mentioned porn! ) See what you like in porn , look at porn as research and consider what things you might be curious about trying " in the bedroom" that you haven't yet tried.
Will things change? Yes, you will likely be just as self conscious about your postpartum body after any delivery, cesarean or vaginal. But find yourself now. And find yourself after baby. And also a big tip. Toys. Use toys to slowly re accommodate your postpartum body to arousal and also to phallic objects both.
If concern is more about tightness, in my personal opinion, your vaginal canal will shrink back to normal size usually. Mine is actually tighter than before kids 🤯 I'm having my third child now, and I'd never opt for csection unless it was necessary. It's a major surgery, you'll need someone helping you around the clock for some weeks. Recovery is brutal. Vaginal birth is natural and what our bodies were intended to do if you don't pose any risks, or emergencies arise. It's something you'd have to really think about, your husband doesn't really get a say in this. This is a YOU decision.
A c section is a major abdominal surgery Do keep in mind that you will have internal and external scar tissue if you get a c section.