Priority Seat

You have to just ask sadly, they will either pretend they can’t see you or just not care until someone publicly makes them acknowledge you. I travelled in until I was 37/38 weeks pregnant and with a toddler this time and STILL people wouldn’t offer me the priority seats. The usual, on their phone, pretending to be asleep or just not caring. Tbh though older women are the worst offenders, I have even been pushed out of the way by women as they dashed for the priority seats. Men are actually the most helpful!

I’m so surprised by it, especially to hear that women are like that! Tbh, I also almost got pushed out by a woman on my way to a priority seat, but I made it there first. Would you always ask to take the seat or only when you felt unwell? I’m so surprised at how people don’t care that I started to question my right to ask for the seat!

I would say though, you are going into spring and summer pregnant which is a bit easier as you won’t be wearing jumpers and coats. It’s harder to hide the baby bump in a summer pregnancy (like my first was), whereas in winter a lot of people early on might be hesitant to offer a seat in case you are just “a bit tubby” as someone told me 🤦🏼‍♀️ the badge isn’t noticeable to everyone and they might be thinking you’ve just got layers on xx

@Bruna I asked when I needed it, like if it’s a long trip or if it was crowded and dangerous. Though sometimes I liked standing to stretch my legs. Honestly almost everytime I had to ask, people would jump up but sometimes it’s tourists who don’t know the priority seat etiquette xx

As bad as it is to say, the etiquette is non existent until you are visibly pregnant. I did notice though, once I was visibly pregnant, and also since I’ve had baby - people were a lot more accommodating. I’ve been asked if I need help with the buggy and even asked if I’d like to sit when I’ve had the buggy. As Sarah said, usually from men. I would definitely continue to ask if I felt like I needed it X

No one offers they see you and pretend not to it’s so bad honestly. I travelled on public transport 8 months pregnant with twins (so very obvious) but hardly anyone would ever offer. I tired to stay as active as possible so the standing didn’t bother me too much apart from the sheer ignorance of people.

Thanks so much for sharing your experiences and points of view, guys! ♥️ xxx

Made me LIVID how people just ignore the badge.

I was 39 weeks pregnant and huge, I got on a bus and it was full so I had to stand up holding the pole, eventually a young lad at the back shouted and offered me his seat, like literally the last person on the bus I would expect to do so. Unfortunately I think you are going to have to ask, I will give some people the benefit of the doubt though and say it’s easy to be completely in your own head and not notice other people at all.

I’m shocked at how people just ignore it! Can’t believe you were still being ignored whilst being heavily pregnant! Now I’ve lost all my hope that things could change when I start showing more 😢 xxx

I found when I was wearing the badge but I didn’t look “pregnant” people wouldn’t offer. And only when I had a massive bump did they make an effort and even then I had to shove my big bump in their eye level 🙃

You guys will know better than me, but I’ve heard that the first trimester is normally the toughest one - you feel terrible, but don’t quite look pregnant yet, so it’s hard to get people’s sympathy. Still early days for me to be able to form my own opinion on this xxx

Yeah people just don’t care! I was standing the whole time on my way home the other day! However the times people have noticed it’s always been a man that gives up their seat and today a man asked another man to let me sit x

Hey mama, you should always ask if someone would mind offering you a seat. I used to think (before I was pregnant) that people gave up their seats to pregnant women because they are so tired (which I was when I was pregnant!) - what I realised is the more important thing is that being pregnant affects your balance, and falling on the tube while pregnant is obviously very dangerous for the baby - always ask, people should be moving for you to give you their seats, don’t rely on them offering it up themselves xxx

So true, Rosie! Xxx

When I was pregnant only one person ever moved to give me a seat on the bus. People are just selfish arseholes. Even since my daughter was born people wouldn't move!

No don’t bite the bullet and just hope someone will actually do the right thing! This is London and people can be complete ass holes! I had this every time I had to get on the train when I was pregnant and even worse for me was that I didn’t actually start showing until I hit the later part of the 3rd trimester!I had horrible PGP from a few weeks into pregnancy and the only thing that saved me was that I was travelling with my then partner who uses a crutch.. so that was harder to Ignore than a pregnant lady! They would reluctantly give up their seat for my ex and she would take it and make me sit there! It was always the jubilee line too which is always packed! One occasion she had to squeeze up to me as it was that packed and the baby kicked her in the back! I don’t think she will ever forget that! Just last week I was holding my son in my arms right in front of two priority seats and both people refused to even look in my direction so they didn’t have to give up the seat!

I had to hold my son in my arms while standing for the entire 16 train stops on an overly packed train just because these people will literally turn their head In the other direction to avoid getting up!

This used to happen to me when I was pregnant travelling to work , it’s honestly not nice , they pretend like they can’t see you. I remember I was on the train once and it was visible that I was finding it uncomfortable, people was just looking at me and didn’t ask if I wanted a seat

@Shay that is horrible and unacceptable!! I have lost all my faith in people now - can’t believe that people don’t have the empathy to do something as small as offering their PRIORITY seat that they shouldn’t even be using. How could people ignore someone holding a baby? This is insane. I guess I just never imagined the extent of the issue as I’m not like that. I don’t ever take priority seats, because I just feel uncomfortable (in case someone might need it for a reason that is not visible), but throughout the years, there have been so many occasions when I’ve offered a normal seat to people that could need it. I’m so angry reading all these stories! I’m so sorry you’ve had to go through that and continue to have to deal with arseholes. How did/do you normally ask people to move? Or would you just rely on your partner to help you get a seat?

@Abby yeah, people just pretend not to see you. In fact, I was on the train when I wrote this post and then I had to take the tube right after. I stood in front of a guy in a priority seat. He looked at my badge, looked at my eyes then looked down. I immediately looked at my husband next to me with a sarcastic smile as to say “look at me being ignored as usual”. Then it was so obvious that I think the guy got embarrassed and offered me his seat.

I hate public transport, people suck. If I did travel I'd point at my badge and then at the priority sign behind the person I'm trying to get to get up, and usually that helps. Or just say slightly louder 'can someone please give their seat for a pregnant woman', then you guilt trip ppl in to being chivalrous. But generally ppl only really care about themselves on the tube 😂 which is why I drove every where