Anyone else?

You should leave now if you think that way. If you don’t he’s going to get worse

What does he do to be so terrible?

Pits fights, screams, calls me soooo many names, grabs my arms, wrists, face when he screams in it, holds me against walls. He's thrown my phone, drinks, he's tossed up a table. Our neighbors called the cops at one point at 3a because he wanted to argue with me over cleaning up his kitchen mess leaving raw egg and chicken out the entire day. I cleaned it up. I worked all day and he left without cleaning it at 11p after I got off work. Came back a couple hours later and we the kitchen cleaned and the dry extremely hard chicken in the trash. This was just a week ago. Lol. He's done similar things over the past 3 years we've been married. Now we're getting into our 4th year and he's gotten worse. His words were very terrible in texts and emails. Thank goodness for transcripts. But he'll start an argument just to get me to try and say something back and I'll barely get a word out and he gets louder and horrible. He has threatened to do this to a point where all of us would get kicked out and our son taken.

Honestly, if our son gets taken I'll say "if I can't have him then he DEFINITELY CANNOT have him." I'm the one with the job and working. I clean the house. I take the trash out. I pay the all the bills with my income. He doesn't work. He plays video games while "watching" our son but our son will be in his room in his playpen we use for his bed with the TV on the entire time.

Our apartment is in my name. Not his. And when tax time came around to file he got angry that I didn't ask for any information or W2s from him. The entirety of 2024 he never worked. He left the house but never brought home money or gave me money or brought anything from the store home and I was paying all the bills including his phone bill that I'm not even on. So, why would I ask? 🤔 And when I brought up that I finished my taxes he said "you mean OUR taxes". Like NO. I'm in DEBT because of YOU. I have to take care of that with MY EARNED MONEY. Sure our son is half his. So I'll give him half of that. But also, WHY??? ME AND HIS MOM BUY STUFF FOR OUR SON. NOT HIM. he's bought ONE can of formula since our son was born. That's it. And that was AFTER he wanted to argue with me about finances and he wanted to say HE PROVIDED and I didn't do ANYTHING. LOL. I said "Dude I have receipts from me I'm buying him everything, and YOUR MOM buys stuff. NOT YOU. So it doesn't count and you providing."

When I was pregnant with our son he attempted to throw me out. Physically. Over us arguing about his dog barking and whining all night and him and the dog being held up in the bedroom and he was SNORING and didn't wake up to the dog barking and yelling a foot away but could wake up to me knocking on the wall for his attention because he had the dogs cage blocking the doorway. Oh we were staying in a hotel at that time. And again, I was working and paying for it. He made me sleep on the small ass couch in the living room area. While he held himself in the bedroom with the balcony. And anytime he'd hear the door open he'd bust out of the room so fast to see what I was doing. But anytime I ask for attention or affection it's an argument. Oh before I got pregnant he bought a Nintendo switch AFTER MONTHS OF BEGGING HIM TO PAY ATTENTION TO ME because he would treat me like I didn't exist and he would always find ways to avoid being around or near me.

Oh and when he threatened to throw me out. He picked me up and I grabbed the door and shut it and he pushed/tossed me into it and it him my ribcage and I had a bruise for 4 months from it. That night I told him if he made me leave he would never see me again but he would never see or meet his boy and I would change my name and he wouldn't know his son's name and I'd be somewhere he wouldn't even THINK to look. And he threatened to kill me then.

I WISH THE NEIGHBORS AT THE HOTEL CALLED THE COPS. They were junkies though so why would they?

Now when he gets in my face or throws something I tell him "you might as well hurt me cuz that's what you really wanna do" and when he threatens to take our son I remind him that he's putting our son in danger and I will call the cops and make sure he never sees his son" cuz I'm not making that mistake again. My daughters dad straight up picked my daughter up while I was working and grabbed all her stuff from my place and took her without my permission. I still lost custody even though there's so much more evidence than parental kidnapping in my daughters dads partner on being a shitty father. But fuck the multiple binders full of evidence that he wasn't even around and solely took her because he knew we were moving which he previously agreed on. So I'm not letting another child get taken from me by people who won't even be there for them, or care for them or raise them right.

Id honestly leave him… if you arent relying on him for anything you arent going to be missing anything and you will probably be so much happier without the extra deadweight. He sounds really abusive you should try get yourself and children out of the situation x lifes too short to be putting up with that shit x I hope you’re all okay and safe x

Oh you DEFINITELY need an escape😳 That is a HORROR STORY!! I know you already know but you deserve BETTER!! That’s crazy that it’s gone this far! All I can say is he can only affect you in your life in the way that you allow. If you’re already paying everything, you might as well be by yourself!! He’s much more of a problem than he’s worth. And you can’t possibly be staying for your child because is THIS the kind of influence you want for your son?? I know you don’t want him to grow up and be this kind of man.

I agree. But leaving him will only allow him to be alone with our son and raise our son alone. And I just cannot trust it. My husband already didn't tell me things while we live together. So if we are separated and he's alone with our son I'll be terrified the entire time wondering if my son's okay and wondering how my son will be when he comes home or if my husband gives him back to me. I know my worth. I know his words are a reflection of how he feels about himself but doesn't want to admit. I know he's truly angry at himself but using me as a scapegoat/punching bag. I have a plan to leave him. I'm getting into a house at the end of our lease, my sister's helping me with schools and the doctors. I just have to get out Medicaid switched to this state. Then, I can make him leave getting a PFA and I'll already have our son in school so the court will at least give me primary physical custody and the PFA will help.