He's going to get me pregnant again if I don't go on birth control wtf do I do?
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yeah this isn’t ok babe
You know that could be considered sexual assault? He obviously don’t care about you or your well being…it’s time to choose yourself
You guys need to not have sex until you can reach an agreement on methods
@Sera Kay ✨ I asked him too when we're even DONE having kids and he refuses and says it's my job to have my tubes tied.
@Elizabeth We've already done that and he's disrespected those boundaries. We agreed on the very least to CONSTANTLY pull out but he doesn't. I can't trust him but he makes it my issue and doesn't take responsibility.
@Mikayla Marschang I really don't want to leave him but I don't know what to do outside of that option.
Wow. I refused to go on BC and partner hates condoms and I expressed why I didn’t want BC and he went and got a vasectomy. Your man clearly needs to grow up. He should be putting your health first. Regardless if you pull out or not you can still get pregnant. If I were you I’d deny him sex.
If he’s consistently disrespecting your boundaries I’d be walking. I get having a high sex drive but if your not taking precautions that’s not very smart & if you know this is how he acts why continue to out yourself in that position? This is giving 🚩🚩🚩 responsible choices need to be made on both sides and if he can’t grow up and be capable of that you need to make responsible decisions for him for your health & safety.
Take Neem leaf, it’s an all natural spermicide I swear by it! I went through the same thing with my child’s father after my abortion. They have the pill form or you can take the oil which I did just insert it into your vagina. I use it like a plan b, I make sure I take it at least within the 36 hour window. Disclaimer (It does have a distinct smell so if you don’t want him to know I’d suggest the pill) you can order online.
Then he is absolute fucking trash for disregarding your feelings I’m sorry
Get spermicide or one of those female condoms! I'm considering it since I'm in the same predicament except my man does pull out! But I still worry about it
"You're job" to get your tubes tied, gross Let me guess a lot of things are "You're job". He definitely sounds like a dick. Bc is horrible for your body and hormones and him not caring about that is awful tbh. I told my ex I wanted no more kids and not to get off inside me and guess what, we had a baby. It only takes once. So yea if you are serious about not having another baby right now I would not let him in there. Without a condom at least. How can you trust him now ? There are men out there that will care for your feelings health and wellbeing and not be such an ass. It's your body and you don't deserve that type of disregard. Also sex is fun but it's really not worth it when you think about it. I'd take care of myself in other ways and tell him to kindly f off lol jus sayin
I'm sorry you've already agreed not to have sex and he's disrespected those boundaries? OP, that sounds like rape and you need to get the fuck out of that house with your kids and go somewhere safe. What he is doing is NOT ok. You are responsible for your own fertility. So if he refuses to use condoms and he refuses not to have sex (again, rape) and you don't want to go on birth control, then you need to leave and leave now. There are DV or women's shelters that can help if you don't have family or friends to turn to. Please keep me updated, I'm terrified for you.
@Hannah I will update this post on any changes if/when they happen and hopefully for the better for my sake. Thank you for the concern.
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OP and everyone who has commented saying they are in the same predicament leave these AH men. They clearly do not care about you and are sexually assaulting you if they come in you without your permission. Like this is horrifying. Please get somewhere safe.
Just from reading this, is this really the type of guy you wanna be with when he talks to you like that and clearly has no respect for you whatsoever. Yeah, you have a high sex drive but there’s other ways to sort yourself out girl, you don’t need a man.
You'll update on changes if/when they happen and hopefully for the better for you? From what you have described, he is routinely sexually assaulting you at best and raping you at worst. He is not a safe person to be around. If you won't leave for you then you need to leave for your children. Nothing about any of this is OK. I'm horrified at this entire post.
There’s other birth control options. Patches , colic , implant or injection every 3 months. It’s not just the pill you can request others too.
Taking the emergency pill each time isn’t healthy it can lead to not working and problems that’s why it’s called emergency pill not birth control.
@N💋 Exactly, ive also heard if you take it too many times it starts to become ineffective too!
@Jennifer exactly! And sometimes the pharmacist can deny you it as if you always go to the same one they’ll say you need the emergency coil fit as it won’t work. Not sure why people take the risk cus it’s not worth it. Long time side effects even not working. If you want unprotected sex get on birth control as that’s less invasive then the after pill as that can make you bleed and not working if you’ve already ovulated 😐
@N💋 yeah, i guess some people just get scared about getting pregnant which is kinda silly because if you have unprotected sex, you’re letting yourself in for the chance of getting pregnant! There’s a lot of different contraception nowadays.
The copper coil is non hormonal
But he’s still an arse even if you find a solution.
@Jennifer and stds….. Can’t stress enough about the emergency pill why it’s there and what for. It's not there for everyday use its there for a one time solution for emergency ‼️ I use to have a friend who did this cus of her taking the pill like as birth control each time it lead her having issues in the future and it was cus of the emergency pill. It’s more powerful the dosage then a regular
I know someone who gets extremely sick with any birth controls she has tried. I also don't do well on the pill or patch. I'm not going to say go on birth control, but there are obviously potential "consequences" to not being on birth control and having sex. I conceived my daughter while on birth control and had even taken plan B the morning after my ex and I had sex. Are there birth controls you haven't tried? I've heard of a few people having a lot of success with the iud. I started the nuvaring after having my daughter and haven't had any side effects as far as I can tell. I'm not sure if it's effective since I'm not in a relationship at the moment I'm just on birth control because my periods are awful.
@Lianna iud last for 5 years it is effective
I just read through all of the comments and OMG... OP I hope you can either come to an agreement with your partner for him to wear a condom and not finish inside you. If he can't respect you in that way, then please please PLEASE respect yourself and find someone who will respect you. There are plenty of men out there who will actually respect your feelings and choices. I obviously don't know the whole situation, but I'm going to guess that you feel like you can't leave whether that's because he's the father of your child/children, or he's threatened you, or you are otherwise scared to leave for another reason. I don't like to tell people to leave their relationships because a lot of issues can be worked out if both partners work at it, but it doesn't seem like he's going to respect you and he actually doing the opposite. Give us an update if anything changes. Good luck!
He has zero respect for you and personally I'd use a dildo until he can wear a condom. Because he is essentially raping you. If you didn't consent to sex with him finishing in you and he does that's non consensual sex
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bin him off x
You know I had something similar with my daughters father I react badly to hormones when I used them in my teenage years so I was happy with the copper coil and wanted to use that when I had our daughter 6 months ago but he didn’t like the feel so I got the implant but how about you try the coil there’s no hormonal side effects and only relus on copper to kill sperm but if you want to stay with him at least make your point firm and clear that you aren’t ready for another baby stop finishing inside of me
Mirena IUD because I was absolutely not going to have another child with my daughter’s father. And I am thankful to this day.
@N💋 yes, that too! Yeah, a lot of women don’t understand how bad it actually is for your body. I got sick with every contraceptive pill I took but I kept trying until I found the right one and it also takes time for the body to get used to it
He’s a disgusting pig. But to answer your question I am on lo estrin. It’s low dose. I get sick and have flu like symptoms from regular birth control. This is the only kind I can take and have zero side effects. You can get it online with nurx if you can’t get to the doctor.
Babydoll… he’s sexually assaulting you. Straight up, there’s no easy way to say that. And it’s a really hard pill to swallow, but that is absolutely sexual assault. You shouldn’t have to put anything into your body that you don’t want… including him.
You should not stay with someone like this.
Is this a relationship you want to be on if he’s treating you like this?
Reproductive coercion…
Ladies we have given OP advice and guidance. Now it’s up to her whether she wants to stay with him or not, we have given her advice on how it looks and what she can do. I hope she does consider all these recommendations and looks out for her well-being as well as her children's. OP please know this isn't normal for a guy to do what he pleases without consent. Yes, you've given consent to sex that's unprotected but if you don't want children I hugely recommend speaking to the doctor or a sexual health nurse. I hope you also do your research into birth control and do not take the emergency pill 24/7 or even once and a few moons in a row as it can cause serious damage (from a medical view) OP please look after yourself xx
As someone who has worked in safe and sexual assault work this is sexual abuse. This behavior is not okay and needs to be addressed in a safe and comfortable environment
Find a better man. He is trash. The end.
DO NOT let him hit . If he won’t wear a condom he can’t have sex with you. And if he doesn’t respect that, you need to leave. I get needing sex I’m the same exact way, I have a high sex drive. But he needs to respect you. That’s disgusting behavior.
GO ON BIRTH CONTROL. What kind of post is this 🤡
@Lianna I completely agree with this
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@Aly she literally said she doesn’t feel good while taking it, why can’t he wear a condom? Him nutting in her is considered sexual assault if she’s telling him not to. She has to go through pregnancy, then labor, then postpartum …. And he can’t wear a condom ? That’s actually insane and selfish ASF . He’s the clown not her .
@Lillian omg that is not sexual assault 🙄 She also has a say in what happens to her body. If she doesn't want to get pregnant and her partner is deemed incompetent to be responsible, GO ON BIRTH CONTROL
@Lillian, that is what Aly is saying. He is disrespecting her boundaries and sexually assaulting her. He WON'T change so SHE has to do something. She has 2 choices from what I can see; go on birth control or leave this rapist ah. She doesn't seem to want to leave she birth control seems like her best option.
@Hannah she literally just said it wasn’t sexual assault 🤦🏼♀️
@Lillian she continues to consent to sleep with him. That is neither abuse nor battery. Let's not give leverage to those who just make poor choices. Any smart woman chosing to sleep with a degenerate has no room to complain lol
Can he get a vasectomy?