Agree or disagree - Waiting for the right age/child to show signs of readiness to potty train is not correct and delays children. If parents introduced potty to their children earlier, they would be trained earlier. Thoughts?

Disagree. It’s very common for kids who “potty train” early have a big regression and have to relearn or develop anxieties around potty training and refuse it

I think it depends if you’re talking about forcing potty training or elimination communication- 2 very different approaches with very different outcomes ☺️

@Philippa that’s interesting, how would you describe both of those things? I’m guessing elimination communication is more when they can talk to tell you they need to go and the other is before they can talk?

Elimination communication is actually something that can start at birth! the parent is in charge of watching the child’s signals and taking them to eliminate on the toilet instead of in a diaper! I didn’t force potty training, but ever since 7 months old I started introducing sitting on the toilet, by 10 months he’d pee or try to everytime you placed him on the toilet! He’s pooped on the toilet before too! But it’s not as consistent, Were still working on it but if I buckled down n got serious he’d get the hang of it real quick (:

Elimination communication is very different to true toilet training. Elimination communication is training you as a parent whilst toilet training requires your child to developmentally be able to understand the expectations, communicate their needs and most importantly physically be able to hold their pee and poo. Personally every one I know who tried to train early, say younger than 2, ended up starting and stopping or having months and months of it. Whereas I did it at 2 years 10 months old and she got it straight away and was accident free after two days with barely any effort from me. I would recommend everyone not to bother rushing.

Not necessarily. If it’s not introduced before 2 then I’d say you then need to wait for readiness signs. Through my job, I’ve seen parents push and start children before these signs (before child is ready) and it’s caused them to completely refuse to toilet and then a cycle of recurrent UTIs from withholding and a general anxiety surrounding the potty/toilet which is entirely avoidable and unnecessary. Many who learn early end up regressing, especially during transition times from preschool to school or during times of stress. Some do the elimination communication method from birth which can work. But if you’re not doing this, I’d advise to wait for readiness signs. From 18 months you can introduce sitting on it with a nappy on, then without a nappy and slowly transition. Forcing the issue can do more damage than good if it’s not done correctly, like EC method x

I disagree I tried my oldest son at 3 and he wasn’t ready at all I tried again a couple of months later and he was ready trained him in a week. My youngest son is almost 3 and still in nappies but he’s autistic so it could take him a little longer

I followed the aap guidelines on this and it said to wait for signs of readiness. Not waiting until they are ready can cause more issues, and it did in one of my kids cases. My middle child potty trained himself at 18 months old. Just one day decided to use the toilet with no prompting from us and was done with the diaper. Now my oldest we tried and tried and tried to force it and she's always hated the toilet. She's 14 now and fully trained but it took her a while to be trained completely at night.

I actually also think that potty training is an outdated method & it should be toilet training straight away. I mean, if you think about it, a potty is actually pointless because it is unnatural to expect a child to sit on a potty in the middle of the lounge or whatever room in front of other people & go to the toilet. We don't do this as adults, so why expect a child to do it 🤔

Both my kids showed readiness before 2 and I went with it and both of them went themselves and was nappy free and everything... My son still had a nappy at bed time from 18 months to 3 and my daughter from 20 months nappy free day and night... We had slight issue for a few months with poo withholding but that was also with a nappy she had a bad experience and she didn't want to let it go... But after about 6 months she has pood and no issues!!! She's now 3 and they go the actual toilet and everything themselves and have been for over 12 months, so I think readiness is better but I also had a potty around them both from around 12 months but got them to make their teddies use it rather than them!

Agree and disagree. I’m not sure about exposing them too young and having training take a year or more. That just seems too long and unnecessary. However I agree with not having to show signs. My son had just turned 2. He wasn’t displaying signs. Didn’t tell me when he had been or needed to go? Wasn’t showing interest in the toilet etc. but I thought he’s clever and picks things up quick so let’s try it. He was trained within 3 days. If id waited for signs he could be 3 or older and still not be ready/trained. I think sometimes people use it as an excuse to put it off.

I kind of agree simply because I don’t think my asd son would ever show signs of readiness. One of the reasons I didn’t wait with my then preverbal daughter. She was 2 though.

I do feel like because we introduced the potty around 18 months old just letting her sit on it when she wanted to or just before a bath she would have a wee and the occasional poo it defo helped when we potty trained her x

We waited until my daughter showed signs of readiness for us that was her being dry overnight for 2weeks we realised we should start potty training and she nailed it, no accidents after 3days and she was 2.5yr old

Tried potty training little one at 2 and it didn’t happen it was cause unnecessary stress and cleaning. She started nursery at 2.5yrs and after a couple of months there seeing other children going to the toilet she told us she wanted her potty once she had the hang of the potty she went straight into the toilet no problem without forcing her too it. Again it was when she wanted to do it- we always had the potty out before hand but she used it as a seat when she was playing most of the time! She did really well and by 3.5yrs she’s been dry through the night. I think potty/toilet training is something you should wait for them to communicate with you. Keep a potty out for them to get use too. That’s my personal opinion and experience anyway.

i’m going to start at 4-5 months - i want them pooping on the potty before 1. they 100% will be trained earlier because you’re not untraining teaching them to shit themselves (elimination communication)

When my girlie reached a age of showing and telling us signs to use the potty/toilet (just turned three) it didn’t feel like potty train in it was more just reminding her to be aware of her body if she needed to go, and that was it ! I’m all for waiting until ready

I'd say to wait until they're able to understand what going to the toilet is, I started potty training my son just before he was 2 and because he understood what a wee and poo was, he smashed it. My other mum friends have tried but because their LO doesn't quite understand what it is, they're not able to. I'd say introduce toilets and the words associated at an early age and it'll be easier to potty train

From what my mom tell me (she’s 67) and other woman her age, their kids were potty trained as early as 1. That truly baffled me because my son didn’t seems ready till 3 1/2. I waited till he could communicate his needs and I was thankfully able to potty train him in less than a month.

I started to potty trained my daughter the week the turned 2. next baby I would definitely start earlier! She was ready and would use the potty on her own. I don't understand how people are unable to potty train their children before they start school!!

I think there are babies that do potty train very early from the get go by doing elimination communication and at the same time every child is different. I also have seen/read a lot about children/baby’s naturally disliking nappies/or rather they have a natural want/need to be clean. I think if we wait there are very clear signs and toddlers will start to tell you when they’ve soiled, they hide and get embarrassed etc. so personally if it’s something we have time to look at i would try the EC/start early and see how baby/toddler feels as i have seen it done and lot of friends, family & mothers i know have done it.

I just think it’s a lot of unnecessary stress to put on both parent and child to do before they’re ready. Just encouraging your child to reach “age appropriate” milestones is stressful enough 🫠

Elimation communication is amazing and was the cultural norm before disposable diapers. I did it starting at 5 months and have starting "wrapping up" potty training since 14.5 months. My kids 18mo now.

@Em that is absolutely ridiculous. You cannot potty train a baby 🤨

@Rachel you can - you can teach them with non verbal q’s to poop. bladder control comes later, but poop comes earlier. it’s healthier for them to not shit themselves - nappy rash etc. google elimination communication

@Rachel it’s a real thing. It’s happened for millennia. It’s just that the parents start as the ones responsible for reading cues & signals, so it’s time intensive & again the expectations are on the parent not the child.

As I always say on these sorts of posts on here, only pay attention to the advice of people who have been through toilet training a child, there’s always people with very big opinions and ideas who haven’t actually done it!

Yes and no, if you don't introduce the potty they won't learn if they're ready or not but if you give it a go, actually do the hard work and try for a few weeks and it doesn't happen then they just aren't ready, to an extent, kids shouldn't be going to school in nappies (bar any medical reasons)

Starting so young requires SO MUCH time spent on studying their ques and getting to a potty at the right time. That's not possible for working parents. I started my son 3 different times starting around 18 months. It did nothing no matter how much we tried. I finally gave up and waited until he showed his interest at 2.5yo. it immediately clicked and by his 3rd birthday we stopped all diapers including overnight. Zero accidents and 3 is still pretty young for most kids

I disagree. Everyone does it differently. No neurotypical kid is going to graduate high school in diapers regardless of how early or late you wait. We did not potty train any of our kids. They were between 4-4.5 when they started using the potty and we never had a single accident after they decided they were ready.

When I had my first daughter I took her to Vietnam when she was 18m- on my street in my village, she was the ONLY one her age in nappies still. Other toddlers walking and running were in undies. The aunties kept making remarks “she’s too old to be in nappies” so I started peeing her whenever I could, and the aunties helped me pee and poo her too like when I was in another room or when she was a couple houses down playing w other kids…y’know what we spent 6w there and she came back fully trained. Night too. So yeah it can be done, and yes it’s cultural but only really attainable for a sahm not a working mum who can’t devote her time to training and in that case wait until the kid is “ready”. If we actually have the time to recognise their cues and teach them it CAN be done and that country (amongst others) just proves it can. Countries where nappies are either $, hard to come by, like developing countries. They Usually toilet train their tots really young from 12-18m.

@Em well, I don't believe that you can teach a child that until they can verbally communicate with you, personally.

@Parker 又 well, I just don't believe in it personally.

@Rachel I'm personally experiencing it with my 1 yr old right now. Since 15months he has used sign language for Potty.

@Alina sign language isn't EC though. They are totally different things.

@Rachel I'm talking about EC and potty training and yes infants under the age of 1 who's parents are utilizing elimination communication do use the sign for potty. Mine did not till 15 months but I know some do because I am in an EC parenting fb group.

@Rachel not personally believing it and it not being a thing are very different 😌

I definitely think early exposure to the toilet decreases the fear ( that ultimately causes a struggle ) that some kids tend to have around the time parents start training But also not forcing it I started taking mine shortly after turning one, if they went they went, if not no biggie. Soon my child was asking to go poop We had a period of loss of interest after kiddo lost their balance and had to be caught before fully falling off the toilet but it was short lived. Basically let your child set the pace, if they don’t want to do it, they won’t.

I think it’s probably true that if you do elimination communication it probably leads to your kid being potty trained earlier but I didn’t end up doing it and potty training was a bit daunting but he still eventually got potty trained and I refuse to feel bad about not getting it done quicker

I tried to do elimination communication with my daughter starting when she was like 6 months old and she wasnt fully potty trained until she was almost 3, didnt do anything with my son didnt even plan on starting potty training until he was almost 3 and he just turned 2 2 days ago and he started telling us when he needs to go potty about 2 or 3 months ago. Every baby is different

Elimination communication is learning as a parent your child’s signs of needing a wee or poop - sometimes these children never wear a nappy from birth :) I think forced potty training is to let them have nappies then remove them and force them on to the toilet with them understanding their own needs or emotions around toileting but also as a parent not supporting the transition from nappy to toilet as an emotional thing not just physical - if that makes sense, that’s how I see it anyway :)

We listened to my family pushing us to potty train before 2 because they wouldn’t stop comparing my son to my stepmoms grandson. It was a disaster for everyone.😭 he was definitely not ready. Pretty sure we scarred him from my dad & stepmom trying to force him & then us pushing him. He regressed and was literally so scared of using the potty because he was not ready. Tried again right before his third birthday & was potty trained in 2 weeks. I don’t remember the last time he had an accident. Now he’s 3.5 and wears pull ups at night, but we’ve been working on that.

@Rachel I agree with you

In other countries the "In a way" start potty training from birth (it's not the same way we do it) however for a lot of us in the US most people don't have the time or luxury to be able to start early because of work. It's sad.

I started using a potty with my daughter when she was 6.5 months old, she very quickly learnt to poo and pee on the potty. Having said that, she’s now 18 months and still wears nappies. 99% of poos are on the potty but she still pees in her nappy. We’re not in a rush to stop using nappies, she isn’t verbal enough yet, but I’m so pleased we started when we did. Never had nappy rash and she fully understands the association. It does make it trickier when she’s at nursery as they don’t know her queues as well

I introduced the potty to my son when he was under one. I didn't push it just had it there an talked to him about it. Slowly taught him more about it got him books on pottys. Then I got pregnant things got difficult so kind of stopped with it as it was too much for me to handle. He used to sit on the potty randomly (not using it just pretending). Now his 2, since having my second I have really tried to teach him to use it, booked stickers, videos, praise but it's slowly seems to have gotten worse. He won't sit on it, if he starts to pee or poop I pick him up to put him on it and he freaks out. His happy to sit in his dirty nappy all day if I let him an he will pee anywhere he doesn't care or really notice. Sometimes he will randomly tell me his done a poop but isn't happy about me changing him. So yeah no idea just commenting to moan about it really 😅. Potty training is the worse thing about having kids so far for me.

I just listen to my child.

@Keyara not all children are able to communicate as well

What’s functional and practical for one family may not be for the other. Introducing the potty after your child meets most of the signs of readiness makes the process a lot faster and smoother for both parents who my be working outside the home or have other kids. If other people want to invest a lot of time into setting their 6 month old on the toilet that’s completely fine by me doesn’t affect me at all and good for them for less diapers going into landfills lol but won’t be me! I just prefer not to drag out the potty training when I know I can make it like a week long process or less when they’re ready.

@Ellis they don’t have to be able to communicate if they’re ready or not. Listening to your child can include non-verbal cues that they do independently and almost unknowingly. It might not be deliberate communication but everything a child does communicates something, even with a ‘hindering’ disability. Obviously if complex needs then you wouldn’t potty train early (or at all) but I agree with @Keyara. They don’t have to be able to communicate in typical ways for us to listen Xx