When did you know you were done having kids?

I have a 7yr old, 2 year old and 4 month old. I’m exhausted every single day and it’s chaos in my house but the thought of my last little bundle not being there is just unimaginable! It won’t always be exhausting and chaotic but I will always have 3 gorgeous babies ♥️

Some people never feel done Others are definitely done I think it’s about taking a considered approach of pros and cons And what you CAN live with and what you CANT live with.

Our cut off is also 35, I have an 11 year old and 1 year old and due another in April. We’re still open to the idea of another one however we have also said we will come back to it as we might decide 6 months after baby is here that we are done

My plan was to have one in 2019 and a second a couple years later. After struggling to conceive, by the end of 2020, I was starting to accept that I’d likely be one and done if I ever got pregnant at all. I ended up conceiving twins via IUI in the Spring of 2021 and delivered two healthy boys in November. So I got the 2 I wanted in the end, and based on our ages and finances, it was obvious that we were done. Having another would mean my husband would be over 50 when they’re born and the need for a bigger house and bigger car.

We are stopping at three kids because we can’t fit any more in the car 😀

I never felt at my limit until the 5th. Everyone has a different threshold. I still get baby fever like crazy but in reality I want to start enjoying the life I have now and not keep re starting.

@Molly this is what I’m feeling - I won’t regret having a third, but I could regret not having them. But it feels more daunting than the previous 2 times! My husband and I are both from families of 2 kids so we don’t really have a reference for 3!

@Tiffany good luck with the newest addition! Hope everything goes smoothly :)

@Allexys wow, super mum! How do you feel about being able to split your time 5 ways? That’s probably what’s daunting me the most

We have a 3 bed house so the limit is 2 😂

I love my two babies, I have a three year-old and a three month old, but to be honest I am done. My three month old is waking up every hour of the night and I am exhausted. He’s also been super fussy for weeks. I am mentally depressed because I always feel like I am moving and do not have time for myself aside from not getting sleep. I’m honestly ready to go back to my normal life and enjoy my two kids and I’m OK with that. I cannot Raise my kids to be happy if I’m not happy.

I am in the same boat you are. We have 2 healthy children. I feel you never regret the children you have, but regret the children you don't have later in life. That being said, so much would have to change for us- bigger vehicles, extra money for school for the kids, renos on the home would need to be done to make more room. Its such a hard decision. Plus the thought of being awake all the time! Right now I am sometimes up with two during the night and it is so damn draining, how would I also be up with a third. Its so hard to decide. My husband is fine with two. Its me whose on the fence. Pregnancy is also super hard on me- I was so sick for over half way.

I'm one and done. It took me a long time to get pregnant with my daughter and when I think about being pregnant again/having a newborn alongside her I can't think of anything worse.

I had my little girl and the thought of her never having a sibling made me so sad. I felt like I had it in me for one more baby, and my partner agreed (after some discussion), so I am currently pregnant with our second. I can tell you though that this will absolutely be my last. I physically don’t think I can go through it all again after this one, and even the thought of getting through the newborn stage and toddler hood again is giving me heart palpitations 😆 But I knew if I didn’t have this little one I would regret it for the rest of my life, that was my telling factor.

Does anyone ever feel truly done? I'm not sure. I don't think any woman ever feels that they are, but you KNOW when you are if that makes sense? My kids are 14, 10 & 8 months! I'm definitely having no more, I'm 40 now and I'm too tired, the sleepless nights have taken their toll on me.

I’m happy with my 2 boys now plus I’m 35 so definitely no more!

That’s exactly why I’m at my limit I simply do not have anymore time to give another child, my days are packed full. And often I find myself saying things like I’m sorry mommy can’t right now I have to feed the baby or change the baby.

I was done after 1. To be honest, if I was like you & had 1 of each, I would be quite happy with that & not be too bothered about having another one.

@Sam do you feel like life got back to normal eventually after having your second?

@Rebecca were you tired before you had your third or when you had your third?

I had an experience where I found out I was pregnant, (third pregnancy would have been my second baby), and I was actually really upset at the thought of it. I ended up having a missed miscarriage.

@Yyeli yeah after a while took some time

We’ve said 2. I know for a fact I wouldn’t go past 3

When I went from 1-3 . My second pregnancy is twins . I realized I don’t ever want to be pregnant or have anymore kids 3 is a lot. I’m also younger and have more things to accomplish. Having more kids would ruin that for us . Me especially bc I stay at home for the first 2/3 yrs of their life

Idk I think you’ll just know… I’m okay if we stopped but at the same time hubby wants a baby girl and so do I … so far we have 2 boys so it’s like what will our chances be

I've got 4 kids and had each of them by c section. I've got 2 boys and 2 girls and I didn't want to put my body through it all again. Each pregnancy was harder and each recovery from surgery subsequently took longer and I was in a lot of pain..So being sterilised was not a hard decision for me. x

I didn't want to be over 35 and be having kids. I felt old at 32 😂 I also wanted sleep back so we had 2 close together and we are done!!!

I don’t think I’ll ever “feel” done, but we are. Couple factors. My age, two high risk pregnancies, nauseous all 9 months with both, PPD, want to start traveling the world with the two we already have, business goals. Just to name a few reasons 😅

@Jaanki I had my first and only child at 35 😄

@Zoe I got pregnant 8 mos pp after my first and we were like oh ok cool so well be 2 and done yeah 2 is great. I think we actually might've be content as 1 and done as well tbh. But that second kid was twins as well. They're 3 and 19 months now and I can confirm when you're done you just know it. The thought of being pregnant again. Is absolutely repugnant to me. I love my 3 and now they're all here I wouldn't change it, it's been hard, but we're getting into the swing of things now. That 1-3 hits hard but you'll get through it xxx

I only have 1 so far and I know I want another one. 35 would be my cut off too, but I'm only 25 currently (26 this year) so have plenty of time. I think for us it will ultimately boil down to finances. Part of me feels like I could have another one tomorrow, but another part of me knows it wouldn't be financially feasible. We want a good age gap so we don't have two lots of nappies/nursery fees etc, but not too much of an age gap for them to have no common ground? So thought a 2-3 year gap maybe good. Also would boil down to our circumstances in terms of the size of our house, its 3 bed so that's limiting in itself so we'd have to make modifications to our living space with any more than 2. Plus.. depends when I start to feel daunted by the whole idea of "starting again" with a newborn😅

I was two and done before I even fell pregnant with the second and this pregnancy has solidified that decision for me 😅 I've found pregnancy with a toddler really difficult, not least because I felt so poorly for the first 20 weeks. My husband asked if I'm ready for baby to come now last night at nearly 35 weeks and I said it's kind of bitter sweet as I know this is the last time I'll do it so holding on to that but I'm also exhausted

The day I got diagnosed with pre eclampsia - 30 weeks

I think it’s hard for moms to fully feel “done” but we have 2 currently (5 and 1 years old) and we have decided we are content. I would probably go for a third but hubby is more logical lol. I’m a stay at home mom and love it but if we had a third I would probably have to pick work back up and put the 2 youngest in daycare. My 5 year old was super easy and the 1 year old has been wild. Fun but wild and doesn’t sleep 🥴😅 so now that we are in the toddler phase with him and he’s becoming more independent-ish, I remember how nice it’s going to be in a year or 2 when we are able to get out more and not have to worry about nap schedules, etc. This is all just a personal preference but times are hard right now and the world is crazy so I feel good about what we have. I’m the primary caretaker bc hubby works shift work and 99% of the kids stuff falls on me so juggling a 3rd would add extra stress that I worry would impact how I “parent” the other 2 that deserve a patient mama.

2 is enough for me I’m 24 and I have a girl and boy so I’m happy to have 1 of each and I know I don’t want any more, the thought of having another one scares the hell out of me

The thought of “just one more” doesn’t bring me joy. That’s how I knew 3 is enough for me.

@Elena I had pre-eclampsia too but luckily I wasn't diagnosed until 37 weeks, induced at 38. I hold hope that I can have another child in future but also the idea of potentially putting myself/future pregnancy at risk terrifies me because I have my son to think of now.. but I also can't bare the thought of not having any more

@Caitlin I gave birth at 35 week emergency section because I went blind from the magnesium drip they gave me to protect mine and babies brain. I honestly hand on my heart NEVER wanna do pregnancy again nor give birth. I also am a solo mum did pregnancy from day one alone and my sons never met his dad.. I don’t wanna trust another man ever again to abandon me at my most vulnerable moment x

@Elena Oh I'm so sorry that must have been so scary💔 I found my birth traumatic as both of our heart rates were dropping so fast while I was labouring they said they didn't even have time to get us to theatre and had to get him out, I was only 7cm. Somehow within all of the commotion of the doctors prepping for the worst, I got to 10cm and he practically flew out of me. Full state of shock after and it took me ages to get over it. What you went through though is a whole other level and I completely understand where you're coming from. I was born at 27 weeks as my mum had severe pre-eclampsia too and it's the most scary thing to think of how bad it can get and how it affects every pregnancy so differently. I frequently think of how I want more children but also feel like I'd be being selfish to risk it, it's so hard x

My 3rd is about to turn one. So worth it the kids love him and are asking for another baby haha. I was always told that you’ll miss all the kids you don’t have. I’ve been told by so many people I’m luck to have 3 because 2 just wasn’t enough. I say go for it. You’re still changing diapers anyways.

I’m done. I’ve got 3 already, got the last boy that we wanted, I had him at 33 now 38 he’s 5 and I also have gotten my body back, my social life and hobbies are up and running and I’m happy, I get full nights sleep and things will just go backwards and I’d miss out on so much if I was to get pregnant again. Just enjoying my kids, and my life now. I did have my first 2 young so in between 2+3 there WAS a 13yr gap but no, I’m done. My uterus doesn’t tingle anymore when I see babies lol I’m quite happy to be the fun Aunty from now on and hold the babies and give them back lol but no more for me.