How to not hate it

😔 I am so sorry you feel this way. I think on some level I can relate to what you saying about treating it like a job not as an everyday life just yet. I got this last week that I go from one task to another and I actually really wanted us to be a family of 3 but we are still married couple with a project and that was not right. I started relaxing on schedules and teachings and focused on just having fun and it massively helped. I am still at the beginning of this journey but being a teacher instead of mum is not sustainable for the next 20 years of your life so maybe also try to ease on teaching and focus on simple coexisting together as one household 😊 Good luck! 😉

Thanks Klaudia - what kind of things do you enjoy doing with your kid(s) that you also find fun?

my LO is 7 months old but I do love dancing- we throw dance party with lights and music daily. I love just rolling with him on a bed and imitating sounds he makes. I love pretending I have a cooking show when I am in the kitchen and he watches me 🙈 😂

but the real question is what would you be doing if she wasn't with you? like what were you doing before she was born. Incorporating those things will change how you view daily life I think. I don't know were you crocheting and now you're not? I like scrapbooking, gardening and watching reality tv so now I do it with a little one I mean we have no screen time but I always tell him all the hot goss and he giggles.

I was also going to suggest that maybe scaling back teaching a bit, and focusing on having fun, would help. My 15 month old certainly can't count to 10, but we have fun together. We have a book right now that we are reading called "sway like an octopus", and we do all the things on the pages together (galloping like a horse, etc). She has a blast with it and it's so funny watching her reactions. One of my other favourites is dancing to music. She loves it and she loves watching me. We line dance to Cadillac Ranch and she thinks it's the most hilarious thing. 🤣 As a teacher and early childhood educator, I know you must be understandably focused on the teaching aspect, but maybe some less structured play would be more enjoyable. Try to remember that all play is educational at this age, and when they're all in school together, no one is going to remember who could organize their colours before 15 months.

Yikes. Unpaid work? That sucks for your kid

@Laura yikes. Mothers judging other mothers.

@Laura there’s literally so much else written in the post other than that. Selective reading much????? This mother is ASKING FOR HELP and you’re being rude for what?

Some advice I got from a therapist was try incorporating your baby in your everyday life instead of revolving your life around your baby.

You’re getting loud for nothing. Yeah it is unpaid work that’s damn obvious but don’t state it like it’s a CHORE for you. You chose to be a parent. Sometimes people need to understand that If you’re feeling a certain type of way peanut isn’t the answer and seeking professional help is. it won’t just get better for you or your child. Imagine them reading this post. It’s not selective reading I read the whole thing that part just doesn’t sit well with me.

@Laura They likely came here seeking other childcare professionals turned first time moms. Looking for their personal experiences to feel less alone in general. If you have nothing productive to give to this poster, maybe just scroll past.

Thanks for all the advice. I agree I need to find something I enjoy and get my baby involved in me and my life rather than me being her 24/7 source of entertainment. I also think I’m finding it tougher than I expected and perhaps professional help is also needed, because thinking about it I’ve sort of lost interest/passion is everything I used to like. @Laura I saw what you’ve been going through and I can understand why my post could be triggering. I don’t want to seem ungrateful and yes I did choose to be a parent. I take that responsibility on 100%, and I’m only here looking for help and to improve myself so I can be the best parent I can. I’m here because it doesn’t sit well with me either.

I understand this & some days I still feel this low . Motherhood is extremely hard, even when our children are thriving we often feel we aren’t thriving in it because it’s our do 247 . There’s no gap for some mums where we can sit down & just enjoy something that brings the same joy motherhood may bring . It’s a constant battle and can be extremely overwhelming . As someone who suffers with my mental health , I completely get you! I hope you find some days easier and some days are going to be like this . Place the little joys in things for yourself and do not forget you are 100% human for feeling like this! There’s no shame in admitting that you’re struggling and needing advice x

Felt 🤚🏼 these feelings come and go. They did with my first child (who is now 3.5) and I feel like this a lot lately with my second (5 months). I stay home with both and the days are LONG and the nights are longer but they grow so fast

Aww my love we’ve all had these feelings somedays weeks and on ! Someone told me when your doing the tedious jobs to find a podcast or put and EarPod in and put some music or book on in one ear ♥️ x

Absolutely no shame here🫂 Not any advice but I completely understand, as a first time mum myself I know how easy it can be to become consumed in worrying if we’re doing enough for our little ones and it seems you’re doing an incredible job raising an intelligent little one please don’t be too hard on yourself🤍

Sending love, I have found having my lo involved in house work so washing dishes putting a wash load on etc really helps me, but also taking her out to fun places I don’t know where you’re based but we have quite a few free museums getting out and about really helps me

Aww I’m sorry you’re going through this. I know how you feel, it does feel relentless sometimes. I’m currently speaking to a therapist because I have really been struggling too. It is unpaid work! The mental load that comes with being a mum is out of this world. @Kelly-Louise that’s a great idea! I’m defo going to try this. What’s worked for me is getting myself out of the house- I go for a walk about 3 times a day 🤣 you can still do educational things like point out different animals or plants etc. Depending on where you live libraries have free story time and rhyme time. The old people love babies and sometimes you even get free childcare for a little while 😅 I also feel like making mum friends with like minded mums helps, breaking up the day by parenting together whilst having a cup of tea/coffee and cake makes it more enjoyable. Lastly don’t feel like you have to be doing something all the time, do some research into independent play.

@Nilam this is all exactly what I used to do! Perfect! Get outside, that fresh air helps everyone! My baby was fussy all day yesterday so even though it was rainy on and off, I got both kids outside several times for my sanity and it helped the baby cheer up! Also, I used to take walks around our old neighborhood with my first alllll the time to break up the day and we had little book share cubbies around the city that I would trade his books out for. I never bought books for that boy, so that was fun too if OP has book share cubbies around!