Tired and drained.

Have you thought about getting him evaluated? It sounds like he is having trouble with transitions and his melt downs are overly long. Other than that, can you try giving him choices? A lot of times this is where they like to have independence. “We need to change your diaper. Do you want to walk over there or do you want me to carry you?” Give two outfit choices “which one do you want to wear today?” (If he doesn’t choose say “if you don’t choose I will, 1,2,3”) Going to bed, is he still in a crib? Does he like books? I put books in my son’s crib so he has something to do if he isn’t ready to go to sleep. But we also have a routine to go to sleep. At this age lots of choices is good. It’ll help cut down on meltdowns. Also telling them everything that is happening is helpful. Even though they can’t talk, us explaining things can help them understand and not flip out as much. Example: if you’re holding him but have to put him down to have free hands. Explain it.

“I have to put you down to make your lunch” that way they don’t think you just put them down because you didn’t want to hold them anymore. I hope this helps! It’s helped with all 3 of my kids at this age.

I dont knownif youre looking for advise or just to vent/be heard, so I will do both and you can ignore whichever part you don't want to see ❤️ 18 months is a hard age! They're trying to figure out autonomy and then they have this big adult still making them do stuff. Your feelings are super valid and I hope youre taking some much deserved self care time ❤️ What has worked for us as allowing our 17 month old to do things on her own as long as they arent dangerous. Recently she has really wanted to throw away her own diapers and if we try to, she tantrums. Its not dangerous, go for it! Yes, one time she did open it on the way to the trash can, and was NOT happy about what happened after, but everything was okay, just a mild annoyance to me and a learning experience for her. I give her choices like "do you want to xyz or should I?"

I also give warnings when we are about to leave somewhere or stop doing an activity, even though she doesnt know time lol so like "we are going to leave in 10 minutes" and then again at 5 minutes and then 2 minutes and then 1 minute and then "okay, time to leave" and 99% of the time there is no issue! I also tell her around the 5 minute mark to say her goodbyes if she wants/to who she wants and then when we do leave I ask "did you say your goodbyes?" To give her 1 last chance to give hugs and kisses if she wants to. This age (for a while) is all about pushing boundaries and being Independant. It can be hard on us as parents since we need to gice that space and time for them, but its so rewarding!

@Carrie @Stephanie Thank you both for replying ( we think he is autistic) his understanding is very small, he is told every talk all the time he looks puzzled half the time some time he say yes odd time he'll help, but unless he wants to do it it's a fight give him choice of cloths he pick but still not wanna get changed ask to change his bum and say after he can have brsast he just wants the breadt there and then. If he don't wanna walk any more say okay we sit in pushchair he climb in climbs out then screams chucking him self on floor or trying run off if u don't let him do want he wants it a melt down and it's worse when you try carm him. They getting bigger and more frequent. If he doing something he should u say no he scream if he tired he'll melt down yeah I'm at breaking point. Just want to vent as their wk been taught with about 4 hrs sleep a night. He such a restless sleeper. He Co sleeps. As anyway I get any break/sleep as if he in his cot he'll scream house down as done since he was about 4m