Being the default parent rant

I’ll start by saying that my husband is a great dad and we have a great relationship overall but I get so burnt out by being the default parent. If we’re both home with baby he either asks me if I want him to do something or just sits there and waits for me to do it? My daughter started getting fussy and needed a change but I’d just gone to grab something to eat quickly. He was watching TV and I said “you can either change her if you want or wait for me” and he grabbed her and stormed upstairs???? Like why is it such a big deal? Why do you have to be told to take care of your child?? He gets annoyed whether I ask him to do something or he asks me if I want him to so I can’t win!! And he can never admit when he finds watching her hard. I know he does because he texts me constantly, whether I’m out (which I rarely am where he plays golf a lot) or just upstairs trying to relax for a few minutes, if she’s being tricky. I WFH part-time and he has a demanding full-time job outside the home. He definitely thinks I have it easier, and maybe I do workwise, but I do everything else in the house. I meal plan, cook everything, after we do the dishes together he sits on the couch and I clean the kitchen and get set for the next day, I pick up her toys, I get her up and make her breakfast and take her to childcare, pick her up from childcare, and have one full day off with her so have to take her run errands. I do all the laundry (but make him put his clothes away 😂), at least a load a day most days. I clean in between work tasks and before work. I also get up with her in the night. He often sleeps right through her crying. He’ll get up with her one morning a week so I can have a lie in, which I appreciate of course. But it’s not enough of a break most of the time and I wind up doing everything else the rest of the day. And he’s always on his phone. To the point where our daughter will try to engage with him and he’ll be so engrossed in his phone he doesn’t notice. He’s getting better about that but I’m still the one to respond to her more often than not. If he’s been on his phone and I check mine for a split second and she falls down or something it’s my fault that I wasn’t watching her???? Like excuse me???? 😂 I don’t ask for much but he’ll do things like leave the remotes out or not close her baby gate when he leaves in the morning. I try not to nag but it feels like he just expects me to take care of it. He always says he forgets and gets annoyed for me bringing it up. Okay, fine, but if I forget I get lectured. If I forget the million things I do for this household we wouldn’t have any meals. We wouldn’t have any clean clothes. Our daughter wouldn’t be well fed, changed or on a good sleep schedule 😂 I appreciate everything he does do, of course. He puts her down every night and bathes her while I get her room ready for bed. It’s just the weight of being the primary parent and carrying the bulk of the mental load really wears on me sometimes and I wish I had an outlet. I’m from another country and all my friends and family are far away and it’s been hard to see the mum friends I’ve made regularly because everyone’s so busy. Mama just needs a break! 🤣