Help

During my pregnancy my ex was horrible and wasn’t there. He would bread crumb me and then act like the nicest person. I didn’t realise the bad shift until his ex told me they slept together. It then all made a lot of sense. He told me he was stressed but I was going through my first pregnancy and I was sick all the time. She sent me lots of evidence yet he denied and lied. Kept denying. I asked for child support then he asked for dna and said he isn’t dad. Then said he never said this. I didn’t realise how he was treating me until I’ve looked back now and I realized it’s the narcissist cycle of abuse. My baby is only 4 months and I feel bad cutting him off but I also need to focus on me. I need to heal. I’m going into 4 weeks no contact. I know this wasn’t my fault but sometimes I just sit and cry 😭🙏

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Look up narcissist abuse on YouTube. There’s a lot of good information on how to regulate your own emotions and how to deal with it. Going no contact is exactly what will help you heal but it will push him to want to control you more. Just keep strong.

He’s definitely a narcissist like the other woman said. Take it day by day. Cry as much as you need to, just not in front of your child. No contact is good!

@Demi @Chinyere is it worth trying to co parent with a man like this. He went back to his ex he cheated on me with then wanted me back and lied and told her he didn’t love me and she showed me the messages. Now he is angry at me for reading the messages she sent me :/

What’s your view @Chinyere @Demi

Like I said, day by day. I’m no expert on narcissism but my ex/baby daddy is one. And the less I have to speak to him the better. I personally don’t want someone like him teaching my daughter his diabolical ways. If you want to try, you can, but please don’t force it. Your mental health has to be stable for your little one and a person like him will always try to destroy you any way that they can. Look at the current situation from an outsiders perspective…he’s angry that you read messages that were sent to you! He’s a cheater, a liar, a gaslighter, and manipulator. He’s basically predictable at this point unless he has more toxic shit up his sleeve. I read somewhere that the worse someone has shown of themselves is more than likely the prevalent part of their character than the good bits you’ve seen, because a good man would never do the things your ex has done. (I hope that makes sense). You should look into narcissism asap

@Chinyere he was angry with me and told me he doesn’t want to talk to me anymore like I was the wrong one. He told her he didn’t love me but then switched it and told me he didn’t. Told me he loves our child but then told her it’s my fault he didn’t provide for over a year because he was out on the birth certificate it just feels like a mess. I’ve blocked him

Not worth the head space, not worth the stress, not worth having your child see you like that. No contact is best.

https://youtu.be/JzgTNI_cdPA?si=2JvzVX4pFyS4LJ80

DoctorRamani on YouTube. She has helped me soooo much on how to handle my baby’s father. I have him on a protection order and it’s been so peaceful.

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