How much do your partners help out

I’d say my partner does a lot - I can leave our little one in his care and have no issues. He doesn’t wake in the night because we breastfeed but he does everything I do bar breastfeeding. Telling you “you do it better” is a cop out response and working in the morning is a given but he is now a Dad so he needs to help and support. I’d have a chat with him and ask him what his reservations are about helping you. Let him know you will burnout if you don’t get the support you need. If he doesn’t know something he should ask you instead of avoiding it altogether

You do it better is a wild excuse... Get better at it then! My husband walks through the door after work and takes her off my hands so I can have dinner and chill out for a bit. He does bottle and bed time and comes down then we spend a bit of time together the two of us and then go to bed. If she wakes in the night I feed and he rocks the crib so I can sleep after I've fed her. Very much a team effort. He absolutely needs to support you more. You should have a frank conversation with him and share stories of what other partners do based on this post!

My partner does pretty much all the nappy changes, all the cleaning of the house, clothes washes and takes care of me by getting me things. I’m breastfeeding, so he cannot help with feeds and I do more of the night stuff because of that, but he will still get up in the night to change her and help settle her at least once/twice too. I’ve gone out shopping or for a meal and he’s looked after her alone with expressed milk in a bottle, too. He has felt a bit put out because my little girl does seem to settle more quickly for me, and she cries sometimes when passed over to him which I think hurts him and has occasionally made him reluctant to take her off of me. Not sure if that’s a factor for your partner, but that might be being a bit generous if he’s done nothing! Definitely have a conversation - it is not at all fair for you to be doing it all alone. Tell him he needs to shape up, because all he’s doing is revealing that he’s not a support whether he’s actually present or not!

Could've written this myself. My partner says the same things and also that I'm the one on maternity leave ?! 🙃 so 3m after we moved out and no longer had a village to help out i spoke to him about my expectations and he does bottles, baths and plays with her whilst I get some chores and cooking done. I also get some me time in the evenings away from baby cos I need it for my own mental health where I meditate read a book or do some yoga. It's my zen time. He however doesn't do nappies or feeds food to her. We tried yesterday and it was a fail. I did leave him with baby for a whole day to see how they'd manage and they were absolutely fine so I think it's just a matter of choosing not to! I'm due to return to work in June so will be having another chat soon about slacking and stepping up it's just exhausting having to have this conversation every time with a grown man who should parent anyway without being told! So maybe have a chat?

That’s not a partner, that’s a boyfriend.

Yeah that's not OK. My fiance has done endless feeds, nappy changes and also night feeds. At the moment due to him being in-between jobs we share the nights on a 3 on 3 off basis, which works great at the min!

Why have you accepted this from your partner for four months?!

I’m in the exact same position! I’m here if you’d like to message and have a rant ❤️ xx

My husband works full time as a teacher and I’m currently on mat leave. He wakes up to get the baby out of his crib and hand him over to me so I can breastfeed in bed every time. Before he leaves for work in the morning he’ll make me a cup of coffee and leave it in a flask on my bedside table. Once he’s back from work he’ll take the baby from me, feed him, do all the evening changes and put him down for his last nap. After we’ve done bath time together, I’ll have some time to shower and do my skincare while he gives the baby a massage, his final bottle and rocks him to sleep. Men are capable, tell that dude to fucking step up.

Go out the house and leave the baby with him for a couple hours. He will see how hard it is! Tell him to grow up. He was big enough to make the baby, he is big enough to look after the baby!