OAD makes me feel like a failure
My little guy is about to turn 3, and at this point just about every mom friend I have has had their second, pregnant with their second or is trying. I've said early on that I'm one and done. We have no family nearby, post partum nearly destroyed me, my husband had paternal PPD, the amount of debt we accumulated in the past 3 years is substantial, plus my kid is what you call "spirited" and has been quite an adjustment. Plus he still doesn't sleep through the night and is still in our room. I'm finally climbing the corporate ladder and have secured an amazing job. I'm almost 35, we got lucky that my CHD didn't pass to the kiddo, and just could not imagine juggling another one. However, the guilt is so strong some days. My kid recently learned the words brother and sister and asks "where his?" He snuggles his baby doll like it's an actual kid, and my husband gets baby fever moments. Sometimes, even after all the logic my brain throws at me, it makes me feel like a failure of a woman and a mom that I don't want a secod...
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Don’t feel bad I only want one. You have to do what is best for you. I feel like I can’t do two either.
I’m a one and done parent too!! My lo was an IVF baby and we can’t afford to do anymore rounds of ivf so she will be an only child. I also don’t think I could deal with a second. She is a lot, she is constantly on the go and I suffered really badly with postpartum rage and I still get overstimulated very easily. I couldn’t imagine adding a second to the mix.
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Darling please be gentle with yourself!!! As an only child on my dad's side and a 3rd of 6 on my mom's, I definitely favored the only child life lol. As a mom to 2 now (my max is 3) I already have extreme guilt that I don't give each the attention or focus they deserve. You sound like your shit is together more than most can even hope for, so NOT let that little voice give you doubt.