Married and want to stop intimacy

The BIBLE says don’t deny your husband see unless for a good reason and not wanting to is not a good reason. And the Bible says do so so he won’t have need for “spoil” aka other women. So just do it. I mean that is your husband and life partner. Even though you can make it more exciting. Seems like the emotional connection needs work before the sex can be enjoyable. Just try to work through this especially because he is a good man. The Bible says “a faithful man, who can find? “ showing the rarity of GOOD MEN!!! It’s a blessing.

Seek Godly counsel not worldly advice.

Pray on this.

I don’t think I’d listen to Billie Jean at all. If you do believe in God, He would not want you to be miserable. If you don’t believe in God, then it’s neither here nor there. I would say raise this with him. It’ll be hard and if he has a high sex drive then it might be hard to come to a conclusion both of you like. I think this app is terrible for telling women to ‘just do it’ and that if you don’t want sex you’re strange… it’s natural. You are ‘normal’, whatever that means, and it’s just an unfortunate situation that you’re with someone who is interested in sex when you are not.

I understand how she feels as I was in a 7 year relationship (unmarried) and hated having sex after like 1.5 years lol and that did nothing but made him cheat more. And plus I shouldn’t have been with him. We weren’t married nor was supposed to. But as a married wife?? Yes this is the best advice and it’s coming from the Lord not Man. The creator not the CREATION. GOODBYE

And how are you upset at another woman giving her advice lol write your advice and keep it moving tf

At the end of the day every woman have their own mind and can take heed to what she want. If you hate the app delete it sis

@Billie Jean completely agree with you! And I’m not trying to invalidate your advice, but the poster may not be religious and therefore she may find your advice guilt-tripping or misplaced. However, I’m not saying that is the case! Sorry if I offended you, I just thought it was important for her to have both viewpoints because I, for one, would not want to feel forced into sex just because I’m married 💜

You gotta talk with him about this. You said he’s a good man and he does right by you, he would probably want to know what’s going on in your heart. He might already sense it. I hope you guys figure it out ❤️

I would get your hormones checked out. I felt the same and I feel back to normal now.

Some of these comments are not it!!! Not wanting to is 1000% a good enough reason to not have sex. No one is owed sex. That is absolutely disgusting to think or say. Talk to your husband and explain this. There are other ways to show love and be intimate.

My hormones are a mess and my sex drive sucks too. I’m still attracted to my partner and don’t want anyone else but sex is really hard for me. I get so upset about it because I’ve always had a high sex drive. Mine was higher than my partners. Now it’s almost non existent. I want it back. But if I didn’t, I’d talk to my partner about it. Especially given how he tells me as he ages his goes down more and more. Love comes in all different kinds of ways. Your husband may feel the same way as you. There are very happy and loving marriages that don’t have to include sex if it’s not an importance to the people in that marriage. The Bible thing scares me as a reason for why you should but I’ll let other people wrestle with that. The current world has made me feel like my Christian upbringing and the fear it’s taught us to have for women is wrong but that’s my own dilemma. We have more power than we know though, believe that.

Definitely talk to your husband about it. It can also be your hormone telling you, you don’t want to fix it. Low or none existant sex drive will tell you, you don’t need or want sex ever again. So I would be 100% honest with your husband about it and tell him what’s going on with you. I would still go check if it’s not hormonal and see if that changes the situation.

My last advice is if you do talk to your partner,I hope you both allow yourself to be vulnerable. My partner telling me about his depleting sex drive was him getting vulnerable with me. When I cried to him that I hate how I have to pep myself up for sex even though I love him and am attracted to him, I was being vulnerable. That’s something we’ve had to work on in our relationship and when we both started cutting the crap to get vulnerable, our communication skyrocketed in improvement. We still have a long way to go but this conversation feels like one where defenses could go up from both parties which is why I felt it was important to mention. I had to teach my partner to be vulnerable too as the way men are raised, it typically doesn’t come all that naturally. I explained how what I said left me feeling vulnerable because of x, y, z and I needed that kind of vulnerable honesty from him as well so he did. Now he even identifies when he’s being vulnerable if I’m dismissive. It’s great

@Billie Jean I am not Christian so this doesn’t apply to me.

Thank you, everyone else for your comments. I was beginning to feel crazy.

@Beth yes, thank you. It’s okay I’m aware of the variety of opinions on here so I am not shocked or upset by it, I was really just looking for someone to understand me. ❤️

I'm horrified at the women on here saying God is the reason you still have to have sex even you clearly don't want to. If you don't want to, you don't want to. And you never HAVE to for any reason or any body especially your husband. If he is truly a good husband he will respect you and your boundaries.

@incig I realized that I gave you advice when you were just looking for someone who could relate. I cannot but was just moved to try to share some hope with you that you guys can figure it out and send a hug. This sounds tough and you deserve a buddy who can be there to listen and understand.

God’s rules still stand whether you are “ Christian” or not

@Billie Jean you’re welcome to argue with yourself in the comments lol.. knock yourself out no one cares

@Stacey 🇵🇸 that’s alright I should be looking for a solution instead of wallowing, he’s a person too

Bb you can wallow for a minute! You guys will create a solution ❤️