How can I tell my partner how I truly feel...

I know what I want to say. I don't know how to go about getting it started. As I don't feel appreciated, loved as a wife. I feel like we just live with each other and nothing more. I'm regretting having a child with him. When it was him who wanted a child more than I did. Yet he doesn't even make any effort to interact with her. I get messages from him upstairs saying "i think she needs a change" or "i think shes hungry" and its like right... or i don't know what's wrong with her as she's just crying. I'm like it's because you're ignoring her. You're not with her. She's just lay on your lap bored and feeling left out. I'd rather just be on my own than have someone else in the house who does fuck all but sat on his PC from the moment he gets in from work to going to bed or wakes up and goes on his PC before work and then claims he doesn't hear her cry out when she wakes up and I get grumpy af because I'm fed up of having to tell him she's awake. Deal with it!

Show your support

I am sorry you are feeling this way. Try to be less confrontational as possible. Maybe write it down and take out the frustration hurt and upset. Keep it factual and explain this is how it left you to feel. He is unable to disagree with how you personally feel. Give him in the same conversation and sentences this is how you could help next time scenario's. As women I think we naturally become the person that feels they should be doing everything and can take on a lot of jobs responsibility off men and they will happily not question it. But if you provide ways he can support you and his child and how this will benefit everyone for example him changing a nappy before he leaves for work allows you to brush your teeth and wash your face feeling fresher and he has a 5 minutes to interact get a smile before work which is nice for him and builds connections. Explain its hard for both of you but it has to be a joint partnership in getting through the hard day to day upbringing

I have also found some men struggle to interact with babies until the babies start to move, talk and are able to interact more. Which is no excuse but maybe you could suggest both looking at interactive toys, walks and parks he would like to take her too and days out. Where he could ultimately take her and show her things and talk to her.

I’m sorry you are feeling like that. My husband struggles with the newborn phase hugely but he got better and better as my daughter got older and is now the most amazing hands on dad to our 3 year old. It is a similar story with our 12 week old but I o is his bond will grow. You should 100% express how you are feeling though as it’s just going to make you resent him more and more. I hope things get better x

He needs to step up and be a father. You should be a team, and he isn't doing enough. This time is crucial for him to be able to bond with his child and bring you both closer together. If you've already tried talking to him about it and he's making no effort to improve things, maybe stay with family for a while to give you a break away from him, it might make him realise he needs to get his head out of his ass.

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