Every new day is a new opportunity to be a better person / parent than you were the day before. Don’t beat yourself up for things you can’t change now about the past, but be the best mom you can be for your little one staring today. There is sooo much time left ahead of your baby’s life to be a positive role model for him. Be a little better today than you were yesterday. All you have to do is try.
You should consider talking to your doctor about post partum anxiety, maybe seek out a therapist ss well to discuss your feelings of guilt🤍
If you’re still struggling with drinking, maybe look for a counselor / therapist that helps with addiction?