Relatives kissing baby on the head / awkward MIL

My MIL often kisses our little boy, we’ve not really policed this until now (he’s 5 weeks) but after speaking to other new parents recently we’ve decided altho it’s awkward it probably isn’t worth the risk. My partner mentioned it to her today after spotting her doing it again, explaining why and that it wasn’t a rule we had made up, it’s something advised etc etc. Anyway it didn’t go down well, we’ve since received a text telling us ‘she wants to discuss this with us as we’ve really upset her asking her to not kiss him anymore’. It’s so awkward and maybe we should have set boundaries from the start. Has anyone else had similar? Are you asking relatives to not kiss little one/wash hands. How have you explained the risks and how has this gone down? For context we’ve already had other discussions with her re her not agreeing with us not putting him in his coat whilst in his car seat. Also not agreeing with us on not using nappy cream (unless he’s sore and needs it, which he so far hasn’t), also being quite forceful in her opinion that I should be supplementing him with formula (he’s EBF).

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Yes I’m sure this is really common. They expect to do things the same way they did in their generation. I’ve stayed at in-laws this weekend and their food hygiene is awful (leaving food out the fridge all day and night etc) I’m always paranoid I’ll be ill but it’s so awkward, actually impossible to say anything. I’ve only just convinced her that my 2 year old needs grapes cutting in half 😅

I have told all visitors, including my mum, to please not touch or kiss babys head, as she has weak immune system and has not had her shots yet... so i do put boundaries in place as well. It is not worth the risk!

Honestly this makes me so mad. Your mil has no right to text you that! I hate confrontation and I hate sticking up for my rights etc like you’ve had to do. It’s not fair. They should just respect what we say and shut up. It’s so frustrating! I did say to mine that nurses and doctors told us not to allow anyone to kiss the baby as flu/ rsv is rife at the moment so I told a white lie even though I shouldn’t have to, to save the arguing !

I really don’t get why people are still kissing babies in this day and age ?! This isn’t a new thing either so they should know better! My father in law kisses our baby on the top of the head but never her face or hands and that is fine with me but I don’t understand why people think they have the right to kiss your baby! Hell I’ve never even kissed my baby on the mouth because I’m worried about germs from me! Let alone from anyone else! I’m sorry that she is not being understanding. Maybe send her the information by the Lullaby Trust!

My mum is allowed to kiss the top of his head but she asked first. It’s totally your call, just stick to your boundaries and be clear you’re not trying to upset her you just want to keep your child safe and fundamentally it’s your responsibility to do what feels right for you.

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