Venting

I'm a mommy in my 30s. I was shy all my life until I became a mother. It was then and now that I had to step up and be my children's voice and advocate. I spent most of my life being quiet and observent. I feel like if I do open up, I ask alot of questions to get to know someone better. I'm a good listener and great conversationalist. And if I really feel comfortable then I'm hilarious lol. It took me a long time to be confident in myself. Being a mom helped me initiate conversation and to be more social. But the problem is when I really like someone I get attached too quickly. And i become overly nice not because I have to but because I want to. I don't want to make people uncomfortable by being too clingy. It's been really weird dealing with other women's personality. 1 minute you're happily eating lunch together and the next minute they're offended because The differences of opinion. I've spent so many years being silent just to keep the peace. When it comes to my kids I speak up. when it comes to my personal life no. It's like I don't want to do too much or not enough. And at times I find myself apologizing to the person who disrespected me first. I feel like giving up on people period bcus everyone seems so weird and flip floppy. Play dates, birthday parties and colleagues, all of these people and places are confusing. I'm reliable and I love helping people but everyone a'nit me. And the last thing I want to do is feel like I'm bothering somebody.

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I 100% feel all of that. And have been burned myself. Finding place where people are actually like minded rather then brought together because of one small insignificant commonality (birthday party,kid age, work) can help but it takes so much time, learn to be open while protecting your heart and trying again. Having grace and realistic expectations helps. And knowing taboo areas. My good friend and I parent very differently and it's not super easy putting our kids together. But we are respectful and moatlynlook for ways to connect with each other outside the kids and so it works. And because she was the right person me being "to intense" was surprising to her but not unwelcomed

I completely understand where you are coming from. I find myself investing myself in one or two friendships and really working to grow those. Kind of sucks because I had a falling out with a friend a couple months ago (she ghosted me and I have no idea why) so now I'm down to only one mom friend.

I live this post. So authentic. And I can really really relate.

@Kate @Emily Luna @Katie Thanks for making me feel like I'm not alone ❤️

I also find it really hard to make new friends. Everyone tells me how funny I am etc, but I'm also very deep and enjoy quite intellectual conversations and struggle with idle chit-chat about mundane things and I struggle to find other Moms who are like me! You're definitely not alone x

I could have wrote this myself I have always struggled but I struggled not just coz of being shy but I have autism and adhd so people find me strange but I have learn the ones who don't are my true friends and its better to have 1or2 really gd friends than having loads of not very gd friends gd luck

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