Permission for other people to hold your baby

My mum just takes my son off me without asking and it winds me up so much

I go back and forth with this because they should ask permission, no one is entitled to your baby however it's just out of love and excitement and they would never mean to upset you I'm sure x

Personally, I don’t mind people holding my baby. Especially, if it’s family. Others, maybe. Even then, I still don’t get upset about it.

I loved others holding our daughter, I genuinely don't get this idea of those we love needing to ask permission first, of course they don't have to. I loved watching others snuggling and giving our daughter cuddles and loving her plus it gave me and my husband a little physical break which I think is important. Just my opinion

I don’t think they need to ask but I’m very open to anyone holding him and always have been..

@s a r a 🥀 the issue isn’t people holding my son. It’s people deciding to hold him without checking with me or people granting others permission when it’s not their place

I don’t mind it, honestly. Most cases, it’d be nice though if they ask.

In general people should ask, but if you visit them at their home with the baby I guess there is a reasonable expectation that they will get to hold the baby.

they should have asked tbh. i felt like this when my son was born, i was extremely anxious about germs and smoke/perfume etc on peoples clothes. they should definitely check with you first and ask what you want them to do like hand washing etc

If family or friends have come to visit us then I have no problems with them holding my baby. IMO they don’t need to ask me for permission for this.

Yeh because also babies get easily upset and only you as mum know their fine triggers. I’d be pissed too. Especially if baby then started crying. It takes 1 second to check if it’s ok. Folks need to prioritise the baby’s needs and feelings over social norms and greetings

I feel like it’s a bit weird. With my nieces and nephews and frjends’ babies I would always say “do you want me to take him/her?” Or “shall I have a cuddle whilst you do x?” Maybe if the mum was obviously in need of help I’d offer “I’ll take him” but I’d always wait for the ok from the mum before actually doing so

It’s always polite to ask for permission first but perhaps they just assumed you wouldn’t mind. People tend to get all goo-goo eyed and excited about babies! 😂

Why should they ask? How else are they going to get to know and bond with your child? What wouldn’t you want them to do that? Unless your kiddy is immunocompromised where is the harm?

@Alana who they deem as appropriate to hold my son could be very different to my partner and I. so anyone that wants to get to know my son, should be able to pick him up? Hardly knowing his grandma is a big reason

Personally when it's family i don't think they need to ask

Tbh I just think it’s basic manners and common decency to ask isn’t it? You would just take food/drink/any item from someone without asking because it’s rude, so why would a baby be any different? 🤷🏼‍♀️

If I’m holding the baby they should ask and not take them off me

I feel like it’s her great grandson so I wouldn’t expect her to necessarily ask for permission as with family I’d expect everyone to hold the baby and I’m definitely fine with that - everyone’s just excited! If it was someone I didn’t know then I’d expect them to ask

If family is coming, I would assume they are allowed to hold the baby unless you said something in advance or at the moment. They didn’t take the baby out of your hands, you could have said no or could have said it should happen later when baby wakes up or something. I think it’s a reasonable assumption that family can hold the baby

I don’t see anything wrong with it. I would expect her to want to hold her great grandbaby and I wouldn’t expect her to ask permission just like I wouldn’t expect my grandma to. If you don’t want everyone holding the baby you should express that or have your partner express that before you guys get there

😂 must be your first! I was like this now when I take my second somewhere I pass him over to the 1st person I see and pray no one hands him back until I want to leave, he’s always bobbing around with someone I’ve never even met at class or friends house 😅 I def don’t think family need to ask permission but if you do you should have said something when you handed them over to the first person

I let all my family members hold my babies/kids. They didn’t need to ask.

I HATE when people pass my baby around without my permission! I feel you mama

I mean it's his grandma and mum so I wouldn't be bothered not like they handed him to a stranger but that's jus my opinion

i feel like it depends on age. as a newborn yes i would expect people to ask bc they don’t know yet what i’m comfortable with but if it’s an older baby and this isn’t the first time at a family gathering i get why someone wouldn’t necessarily think to ask but your feelings are valid and you could just explain you would be more comfy if they asked first

I am expecting my 3rd little one, with my first 2 everyone ether asked to hold them or I offered if they wanted to hold them. I take all the help I can get sometimes but I am very grateful they ask first.

We don’t let other people hold our daughter except immediate family & nobody holds her without washing their hands/hand sanitizer immediately before touching her at all

Yes, they should have asked. But equally, it's a given that they will want to hold the baby... Out of politeness, they should have asked.

I am pretty open that way and don’t mind if someone wants to hold my baby, just as long as they have washed hands first!

I think it depends on the person holding the baby. Some random friend or distant relative like an aunt you don't know probably would like them to ask. Closer family members then I wouldn't be too bothered it's still polite to ask though x

I dont expect close family or friends to ask as I trust them. I think its OTT to expect family to ask. However each family dynamic is different so you do what feels best for you and baby.

Personally, I don’t mind if my family doesn’t ask for permission to hold baby. Although I always appreciate when they ask, I think it’s more polite and respectful. However, it also depends on how they go about it.. For example, when I was 3 weeks postpartum my husbands aunt texted me saying she was planning on visiting us that weekend to “see the baby.”Didn’t even ask if I was ok with having visitors or anything. I politely told her that that weekend didn’t work for us and the following weekend would work better for us. Well, when she came, I was holding and feeding my baby her bottle, and she did ask if I wanted her to feed the baby so I could take a break. I politely said no and that I didn’t mind feeding her. Well, about 10 minutes later, she says “Here, give me her, auntie wants to hold her” and proceeded to grab her from me.. That pissed me off. So I politely told her she could wait until I was done feeding her. I wanted to make it clear that it was MY decision, and not hers.

It depends on who the person is. I will happily hand baby over to certain family members/ friends without them asking. But some people I would definitely like to be asked. At the end of the day, your baby, your decisions. If you aren’t happy with it, doesn’t matter who else would be okay with this.