Invite round or leave them
Show your support
@Kirsty well maybe I did, Im not the best with wording things. But some of the stuff we do on the weekends is going out on walks and visiting the parks. But they aren’t interested in doing that and joining us. We’ve tried asking in the past so many times. And the money part comes in as that’s what they think is the reason my parents see them more, but I live next door to my family on both sides. I can’t avoid them if I tried and I am very close to them too.
I would invite them around then you have played your part, if they choose not to accept then that is their choice. In a similar situation myself. They keep inviting us around and their house is dangerous for my toddler. Last time he got so overwhelmed and upset because he was constantly stopped or moved away and there's nothing for him to do. Anyway they keep dropping hints wanting me to go over with both my kids. I just invite them to us. They don't come , but at least I can say I tried. Unfortunately, I think they think I'm the bad guy. That's fine! I'm the one that has to deal with the absolute state my toddler is in afterwards and I'm not doing it anymore!
@Siobhan we have said they can come round, but they never responded back to us. But we get no messages from them unless it’s us reaching out to them first. It has always been our initiative to take our eldest round when it was just him.
some people just don’t know how to have a relationship with other people let alone a healthy one. i think ive met my MIL 3x?? and me and my husband have 2 kids together lol she’s very nice but it’s just hard getting together and i let my husband handle everything when it comes to his family. she doesn’t really have a relationship with us or at least not a close one like my family and i’ve just accepted that 🤷♀️ like not every relationship in life is going to be a good or healthy one and i would just let it go tbh. focus on u and ur new baby and family and just everyone else do whatever they’re gonna do. the sooner u stop stressing about it the better like they have free will and can come or make an effort if they cared so much. good luck 🤍
Could have written this myself 😔 So sad, but people have reminded me that it is not my job to create a relationship between my children and their grandparents. It is very true, but it still hurts when they're not really interested!
@Siobhan it hurts so much when they have openly said they miss seeing my eldest and nothing about our second baby. But they don’t have anything to do with their first grandchild (from my sister in law) either and they weren’t excited about our second being a girl either ☹️
Totally their loss. Children grow and change so quickly! Families, eugh! 😖
It might just be the way you have worded it, but it kind of sounds like they are more of an inconvenience than anything else. And maybe they sense that? Some parents wouldn't want to just invite themselves around and if you are always busy doing expensive things at the weekend, they probably feel a bit self conscious about not being able to afford it. If you don't want to go to their house, then you should invite them round. They would probably really appreciate it.