Giving birth anxiety

I’m in the US. I just had my baby in October. I honestly didn’t have a birth plan. Everything went great though. Would you like to join my iMessage group? We’ve actually got 2-3 moms in the group who are from the UK. They might be able to answer any questions you might have about giving birth. One of them just had her 4th baby about 3 weeks ago. Just message me your number and I can add you. They may also be able to help you know what to bring with you to the hospital.

I’ve had 5 children! The anxiety is so normal even after a few. Overall I had very positive birthing experiences. I didn’t advocate for myself or my baby enough the first time because I was so young but that’s the only negative experience I had, the actual birth was fine!

Hey mama If you're ok in the UK, you are probably using the Badger Notes App for pregnancy tracking. This App has a Birth Plan which you have to submit, and it is basically answering questions. Your anxiety is absolutely normal, because something very new to you is going to happen soon. I would focus on birth preferences and pain relief options. This information will be used by your midwife who will assist you during labour and birth. My midwife followed the plan strictly, assuming I did not have any complications.

I'm also a first time mum and also feeling very anxious about labour, so don't worry, you're definitely not alone! Hope you're doing OK though. I'm trying to ease my worries by not getting too in my head over my birth plan. Both my mum and my mother in law have given me a very no-nonsense talk about not having certain expectations! I know there are things that I definitely don't want (like students in the room) and some things that I definitely do want (yes please, epidural) and I've shared these with my midwife and also with my husband so that he can advocate for me should I need it. The rest of it, I'm trying to keep a fairly open mind and have said I am open to trying different positions/approaches until I find one that I like. As mentioned above, if you're using the badger app, do take some time to look at the readings. They are really helpful at explaining things! You can also use the conversation section to guide your discussion with your midwife, which I found helpful x

The anxiety is mostly about the unknown the first time. Labor progresses is stages, and you can adjust to each stage finding what is most comfortable to help you through. I found having options eased the anxiety the first time (i.e having a birth ball, birthing pool, estim unit, combs to squeeze, hanging fabric to hang on while I squat, birthing affirmation tracks saved that I pre-screened). I was way too hyped up the first time when I started getting little twinges of labor. I’m pregnant again due in September and am going to relax at the beginning of this labor instead of getting myself worked up

do the hypnobirthing course and read siobhan millers book. that will help you

I'd ask for all pain relief and I would get myself into hypnobirthing. Have someone with you the whole time.

Used the birth plan from Mommy Labor Nurse for 2 births and will do the same with my third. There’s a visual birth plan and traditional option (I customized and printed both). Put the print outs in a folder and had in my hospital bag ready to go. It was SO helpful! My nurses and doc passed it around so I didn’t have to answer a ton of redundant questions. https://blog.mommylabornurse.com/how-to-make-a-birth-plan Also I’d recommend their birth course! I did the epidural but I think they bundle all of the options for a really affordable price. You got this! Their online birth courses eased a ton of my anxiety and it’s go at your own pace

I can’t recommend the positive birth company enough or the book Siobhan Miller wrote to educate yourself on the different choices you can make for your birth - I think the anxiety comes from the fact that this is an unknown territory, so there’s nothing better than doing some research and reading positive stories to help ease it! The first time I read the questionnaire I was also anxious as it’s quite a few pages and it asks things that I have never heard of or thought about, like Vit K for babies, but I just took it a step at a time, started learning more and I think I now have a fairly good idea about all the answers.

I massively recommend doing a hypnobirthing course, reading books, listening to podcasts and watching positive birth videos on YouTube!! It’s absolutely amazing and has helped massively with my anxiety!!!

@Alex I completely agree!!

I had my boy 3 1/2 weeks ago. First birth as well I did have a birth plan but it kind of went out the window when I went in to labour just because I had a quick labour. But my advice is when you do go in to labour make sure you communicate with your midwife and let her know if you do want the medication they offer to ease the pain. Keep talking to them throughout the labour too. Having a loved one in the room while in labour too helps with the nerves too. I had my partner and just talking to him helped.

This is my third and honestly I never bothered making a birth plan, my thought process was births very rarely go how you plan them so a birth plan seemed pointless to me, I just listened to my body and asked for different things as and when I felt I needed them, the midwives were great and did everything they could

There’s a book called practical ways to make your birth better by Siobhan Miller. I’d order it and read it. It made the difference between my first and second birth experience like night and day. First of all, you have nothing to worry about. This is what your body is made to do. You just have to trust your body to do what it’s supposed to do. Secondly, read through the plan document. Have a think about your preferences but accept that some of it is beyond your control. Accept that the easiest way to reduce your anxiety is to go with the flow. To change your plan depending on your feelings at the time. Trying to stick rigidly to a plan (for an occasion that can’t be planned) will only make you more anxious. You got this 💪🏻❤️

The anxiety is so normal. I didn’t have a birth plan, more of just a short list of preferences. My personal advice is to not get so hung up on a plan and to try to keep an open mind. ❤️ My birth went completely different than I expected - a plan didn’t matter.

Honestly, do a hypnobirthing course. I'm a very anxious person and did one and everyone expected me to be a nightmare giving birth as I'm a wimp - I faint with pain or blood 🤣🙈🫠 I bossed birth twice, only gas and air on one and nothing on my 2nd. Just remember your breathing techniques. You also don't need to have a plan! I didn't have one. I fjnd it's better not to plan cos if it changes, you don't have the panic of it not going to plan. And finally birth is nothing like on tv, breathe and try not to panic cos that makes it hurt more. It's better than tv. Talk to your labour team they will help you and support you. You got this mamma 🫶

I recommend doing a free hypno birthing course this will help with your anxiety and your see videos on what to expect good luck and just remember and don't listen to people's negative stories about birthing it can be an amazing experience I no plenty of people who had great births

The hypnobabies hypnobirthing course helped me tremendously in mentally preparing for birth and reducing anxiety. I definitely recommend checking it out! Sending love, you got this mama 💛

I’ve never heard of a birth plan questionnaire. I had no plan other than to breathe and keep my mental space positive during birth. It worked. I was induced at night, fell asleep, woke up to contractions in the morning, had the epidural, and she was here very fast. I pushed twice. The only advice I would give is not get the epidural. I was pressured to do it because they were concerned I was gunna have a seizure (high blood pressure). I felt fine but gave in. My daughter’s head beat slowed from the epidural and she had to be in the nicu with a cpap over it.