Is my husband sabotaging me?

So this may be an odd question but my husband is either really f#$@& stupid or he's actually doing this crap on purpose. Ok I had to take the teas test, I had be studying a little and Im stressed and I have exams for others classes for mid terms and here's the thing, we haven't had sex in 4 months at least it's been awhile. He does not try not at all well night before my teas I took a melatonin to get some sleep early so I could get up early and get a bit more studying in before the test. He came in and woke me up out of a dead ass sleep trying to have sex with me. He stuck his hand down my pants and I literally play dead. This isn't the first time he's done this. He gave up went to the bathroom did his thing and went to bed. I didn't go back to bed, i literally did not sleep I failed my freaking test and this isn't the first time something like this happened this is the 2nd time I took the test and didn't pass the time before he knew I had 3 exams and the teas and he left and went fishing and we have 4 kids I had to deal with. I don't drink anymore I did fairly regularly but I quit because he kept telling me I was doing things that didn't add up or saying things that were out of line and according to him weren't proved so I quit and he kept filling the fridge full of the drinks I like. It was definitely not for him because he only drinks the dark nasty beer. Any way I'm just venting but gosh I don't even know what to say anymore to him I'm so tired and getting my nursing degree so I can move out and have a good income is so important to me and I feel like he keeps making it as hard as he possibly can. I'm retaking it in May I'm not telling him when or what I'm doing and see if everything's goes better this is the last time I can take it to get into the program this fall and I can not let him mess it up for me Thanks for reading

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I’m so sorry. It’s unfortunately possible that someone you’re close to can be your worse nightmare soemtimes. That’s completely inappropriate for him to do that. If you’re not prepared to leave, I would no longer involve him in any information regarding tests or studying.its sad and unfortunate but sometimes is the reality. Don’t let him know when you need to study or when a test is just keep it general information. Even if you can avoid Saying you have a busy day. And the sex thing is just wrong on so many levels. Men want physical touch when it’s convenient for them and don’t want to do anything for it… keep your guard up. Get ur degree quietly and then set ur self up for the future without him. He should be encouraging you of course not making it harder to succeed. Hugs girl

Wow I’m lost for words 😳 he is absolutely sabotaging you so you don’t get that degree and that’s honestly disturbing. And I don’t even know what to say about the drinks situation that’s major mind games I wouldn’t be with such a strange man who’s trying to f*#k up your dreams

Him not accepting my boundaries has been a huge problem, I always wanted to pursue my nursing degree but the way our relationship is going it's been an eye opener and has really pushed me because I can't do this for the rest of my life. I have 4 kids to take care of and the only way in this economy to do that is by getting this degree. I'm sticking it out until I get it and then I'm out and I believe he knows this. And don't get me started on the house situation because he refuses to help around the house. Once he even got made yelling "why do the kids need a clean house to live in" like do you hear yourself? Btw I need did drink any of the beer he eventually quit buying it, I have asked and asked that he not drink and he refuses to quit. The other day driving with the kids I asked him not to drink on the truck and he did anyway and I said it's the last time the kids are allowed to ride with him which of course got him out of taking the kids places but I'd rather do it then put them in that situation

My ex would do similar things. Even down to taking the car keys / hiding my phone / wiping my make up off before big interviews. Move in silence & be safe if he is trying to sabotage you . People will go to lengths !

“This isn’t the first time he’s done this” This is a troubling statement. On those previous occasions, did he actually have sex with you whilst you were pretending to be asleep? Either way, it’s definitely sabotage on his part. You took a melatonin so he knew you’d be in a deep sleep. To then suddenly pick that night, after months of nothing, to try and have sex with you is extremely disturbing. You’re basically living with the enemy. What an awful situation to be in! My advice would be to move in silence. He knows nothing of your agenda, exam dates etc. Do what you need to get done and grey rock him the remainder of the time you have to live with him until you are able to leave.

i’m sorry but him shoving his hands down your pants whilst you play dead is SEXUAL ASSAULT. that’s not okay in the slightest, husband and 4 kids or what, it doesn’t matter you don’t deserve that and shouldn’t have to stay with that. it’s assault. even the sabotaging is manipulative and controlling/coercive. if you aren’t prepared to leave him, then you need to address the sexual assault at least abs let him know that that is not okay in the slightest. don’t communicate with him about your tests etc, i don’t understand why he’d be sabotaging you but he sounds like an asshole

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