I’m going to lose my mind

My son will NOT stop crying everytime I put him down. He will feed and fall asleep I’ll put him down he wakes up crying and hungry and repeat. I gave up and gave him a bottle and he was fine and I for sure know he got enough I put him down and he’s instantly crying. I tried a soother didn’t want to take it I’ve tried swaddles and different pj’s, a wrap and a swing and nothing he just wants to be in my arms 100% of the time. I burp him checked his diaper I’m going to lose my mind. I have another child and the house is a complete disaster I can’t get anything done and I’m starting to get mad at everything. I’m tired, I’m hungry, I can’t even brush my teeth or go to the bathroom.
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My second did this at first too. A swaddle really helped them sleep. They had an over active moro reflex (startle reflex) and Any little noise would startle them if they weren't being held. If your son is still young enough for a swaddle I recommend trying one, and you can also try baby wearing with a stretchy wrap. That really helped us during the day.

@Jae 👾 he seems to always want to be on the breast. I know there’s milk so maybe cluster feeding but with a bottle I know he’s getting enough then still wanting more minutes after.. I’m worried to over feed him

Cluster feeding is rough, but perfectly normal. It's practically impossible to overfeed a breastfeeding baby. It's very possible he's just having a growth spurt(or a leap) How old is he?

How old is baby?

He’s 3 weeks old and the first 2 weeks we were in the children’s hospital with him

How old is baby and os he hard to settle when crying? Does it seem like he's in pain?

At 3 weeks I'd say he's definitely cluster feeding. It's hard but you'll get through it. Take any help you can get from family and friends for your oldest, and utilize the TV if you have to.

If there's nothing else going on then I'd say cluster feeding. Or he's just comfortable with you and needs you close right now. My daughter is 8 days old and doing the same. Some naps she will do independently while others she wakes after a sleep cycle wanting to be held again. She is having diaper rash issues right now though so I think she's mostly comfort feeding and wanting to be held. Her nighttime sleep is getting better though. Can you get help with the 2nd child? My husband is going to be home with me for a couple weeks but then I'm sending my toddler to daycare full time when he's back at work. I couldn't handle them both until we're out of the newborn stage at least.

Also just keep trying to put him down for naps, even if he comes unsettled.

My oldest was exactly like this. One of us had to stay awake literally 24/7 holding him. I had to put him in a wrap to use my hands at all for months on end until I gave in and sleep trained. People who have never been through it just don't understand. I'd suggest looking into High Need Baby groups and support online. I think there's still an active Facebook group that can help. If you haven't, try switching over to the Eat Play Sleep schedule instead of feeding to sleep. You want to try nudging your baby toward independence- especially with sleep- as much as you can. It will be hard and most advice people give you won't work, but just keep trying until you find something that does. A wrap or ring sling carrier might help, too. Hopefully, this will pass soon. My oldest started walking at 8 months and his independence went through the roof. He's 4 now and can happily play by himself for hours. The High Need Baby phase is extremely difficult, but it doesn't last forever.

My little girl kept waking and crying when I put her down after a feed. At night it was horrible. I don’t think it’s recommended but what I did was put a heat blanket in her cot WHILE I WAS FEEDING HER. And then when I would put her down I would take it out, turn it off and leave it on the floor ready for next time. I found that settling her on a warm surface helped so much x

Does bubba stop crying when your holding them? X

Ours needed a script for pepcid at 4 weeks old for acid reflux and it was a life saver

Totally normal Hun. It's hard but it's totally normal

I would just tell myself fk the chores. Just completely neglect the chores from your brain to stay sane. They’ll get done eventually. I have a habit of really obsessing over chores and I have to manually tune them out to survive when the babies are clingy or having trouble and it’s a huge load off and seriously helps with irritability. It’s temporary you’ve got this! Check your insurance and see if they have a program ( like mine has “healthy families) which is basically moral support) and reach out! Just think, you’re that babies whole world and really try to focus on that🥹 it’s hard but a stupid change in perspective really makes a difference

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It's difficult, but this is completely biologically normal behavior. https://sarahockwell-smith.com/2012/11/04/the-fourth-trimester-aka-why-your-newborn-baby-is-only-happy-in-your-arms/

it could be colic or maybe just adjusting to everything. Try feeding sideways laying down so you can detach when he falls asleep if your open to trying that. Also sometimes it could be the setting. I put smooth instrumental jazz on when my baby is sleeping and it helps her fall asleep and stay asleep better. Things will get easier. Sometimes if you can out headphones in. Make it to where you can see the baby and everything but your music is the main thing you hear. Turn on your favorite song and dance around with the baby and sing to him. It's the beginning it's normal to be overwhelmed. Ask the doctor what stuff you can give him colic meds. It might help. Your doing amazing and how your feeling is normal. Your not alone

If he’s going through a growth spurt that can cause this. My baby went through the ne at 4 wks and didn’t sleep for anything and always wanted to eat. She grew out of it in a little less than a week

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