Money & Privacy

Is it logical to give money to someone with a spending problem and expect them not to spend it? Of course what you’re doing is right. It would be irresponsible and enabling of you to give him money for important things instead of letting him prioritize the money he earns. He can learn to make sure he has enough for fuel to see his baby before wasting it on nonsense. Dont be gaslit.

@Hind thank you. I’ve put in a boundary with him that he won’t know how much money I have, but have still agreed to pay my fair share of things for baby and bills, but he says I have changed for the worst because of all my new boundaries- I’ve only started establishing them recently as I want my son to grow up around healthy relationships. Thanks for the validation 🩷

Keep your money and savings private. Always! You’re doing the right thing

Him telling you that you've changed for the worse by implementing boundaries that financially secure you and your child points to exactly the kind of person he is. Keep your money separate, make sure he has no access to your accounts. If he is working the he can find a way to get down to his child.

I agree with the others, you’re doing the right thing. Having boundaries does not make you worse, it means you’re looking after yourself and your partner should be supportive of that. You are trying to build a future for your child and that’s amazing. If he doesn’t have money for things he needs from working then he needs to budget better or prioritise the things he’s spending money on. He’s your partner, he should be supportive instead of trying to manipulate you into sending money x