Advice with 2 under 2👶🏼

Hi mummys! So i have 2 under 2 a 20 month old little boy and a 7 month old little girl. My little boy adores his little sister and is amazing with her when I’m around but any time I turn my back for one second or even go in to the next room ( I can still see them clearly ) he hits her and nips her has anyone had this happen? Hes not jealous as I give them both the same amount of attention and as I stated he’s fine when I’m around I’m just so worried he’s going to continue to be horrible to her. He also takes everything from her wether it be toys she’s messing with or her bottle or her dummy sometimes even just things she’s holding and cries when she takes something of his I don’t know how to resolve this does anyone have advice. Thank you!🩵👶🏼🩷👶🏼

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Hi Ella, you are a super mom raising 2 under 2 babies! In my opinion, what your son does is not completely strange. He probably understands a bit that baby girl is his sister but he may not know the best way to treat her. He is still exploring and figuring things out so maybe you have frowned at him a few times he played rough with her so he may decide to check it out when you are “not there”. Gently explain to him that it is not nice when he does something not good to his sister but immediately teach me the alternative way of doing so. Children learn by observing. Intentionally do things with baby girl the way you want him to do it. Show him how to be compassionate. Give kisses and allow him do the same, sing together with them, play together. A 20month old baby does not want to share anything! It is absolutely normal however, while you don’t have to force it, teach him to share, use the word “share” often and show him what you mean.

Show him they can take turns holding the teddy bear, when they eat, feed them together, they can “share” while taking turns to have some fruits. It won’t be easy and you really have to be patient but over time they will learn. They will play together, encourage that, put them in their playing crib and put the toys there. Slightly ignore them and allow them to figure out how to be with one another peacefully (and sometimes not peacefully 😄😄). Uhmm, I wish I have specific TV shows I can recommend but watching TV shows where children look after their teddy, pets or siblings can help. Children learn a lot by seeing and observing. Be gentle and patient. They will come around. Continue talking to him. Tell him what he has done wrong and IMMEDIATELY proffer alternative way of doing it. If he takes the dummy, well baby girl can have the second dummy you know but let him know baby girl is happy to “share” with him. If he takes baby’s bottle, maybe you can prepare a bottle for him too.

You are doing so well and I wish you the very best!

I have 2 under 2s and most of the time goes smoothly but sometimes my oldest hits her sister too not always but it happens