PND & PTSD and feeling alone 😭

Me and my husband had a fight and it got taken out of hand, I pushed and scratched him (I know I shouldn’t) I said something to him that I knew would of really hurt him and upset him and when I said that he pushed me and slapped me on the hit back. I stupidly called the police and they arrested him, he’s been let out on bail (he admitted slapping my head) All I want is him home, it was a fight that got out of hand. I’ve now been brave enough to admit I’m living with what I think is pnd and ptsd I’ve never admitted to anyway and I’ve had to hit rock bottom to admit I can’t go on anymore. He’s allowed to see the kids as there’s no issues there, but the police won’t let him near me or the family home as they said it’s for my safety! I just want him home, the issues are all me but the police don’t want to listen or care. My children are 4 months and 16 months. I’m so scared, part of me feels lighter for telling the doctor/health visitor how I’m feeling and admitting I’ll speak to someone through the nhs and I’ve already contacted private councillors too. I’m just so scared what happens next? How to you get better from pnd. I love my boys to bits and there my world so why do I find it hard 😭 My husband is my person, and I’m scared lost without him 😭 I know it’s all my fault he’s had to leave for 2 weeks then could be a lot longer but I just want him home. All I want to do it tell him I’ve been brave enough to ask for help. A 3rd party professional person has told me that he wants to come home and he knows it was a fight. I don’t even know what I’m writing or why I just feel so alone 😭